People buy good products that work; therefore, advertising is unnecessary and is no more than a form of entertainment. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #products #work #form #entertainment

These days

people

like to have

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

high-quality

product

Fix the agreement mistake

products

show examples

so they look for them by searching on a website or their relatives. It is often claimed that

community

Correct article usage

the community

show examples

want the best

product

market

Add an article

the market

show examples

Fix the agreement mistake

advertisements

show examples

does

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

not influence

Change preposition

apply

show examples

this

group of

people

and some folks look the

Fix the agreement mistake

advertisements

show examples

as a hobby.

While

sometimes has side

effect

Fix the agreement mistake

effects

show examples

, in my

opinion

Add the comma(s)

opinion,

show examples

it is necessary to notice them. To commence with,

Fix the agreement mistake

advertisements

show examples

can improve public awareness about the quality of a

product

advertisements

show examples

can increase revenue and sales. Technology is an inseparable part of our lives; technology has accelerated task accomplishments and

also

Rephrase

apply

show examples

it has facilitated our lives. These days we see a wide variety of

advertisements

with different methods on the TV or on

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

social media

such

as Telegram or Instagram so thanks to the internet that

provide

Correct subject-verb agreement

provides

show examples

a background for each person to search any

things

Correct your spelling

anything

show examples

and be aware of

Correct article usage

the

show examples

quality of a

product

. Because of technology, a lot of factories and organizations attract many consumers.

For example

last

day I saw a billboard on the highway that was

Change the article

show examples

about

Change preposition

for

show examples

toothpaste so I decided to buy it under the influence of the

therefore

advertisements

are useful both for consumers and producers.

However

, it can not be denied that

advertisements

sometimes deceive

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

consumers and

some times

Correct your spelling

sometimes

show examples

they create a fake need because it may increase consumerism. Despite

this

, I still believe that

advertisements

can bring about many merits. By way of conclusion, it appears to me that

is a useful method that

introduce

Wrong verb form

introduced

show examples

to the market and has a lot of

benefit

Change to a plural noun

benefits

show examples

both for

customer

Correct article usage

the customer

show examples

and

factory

Correct article usage

the factory

show examples

Submitted by TUTOO on Wed Dec 20 2023

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coherence cohesion

For coherence and cohesion, ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea that is extended and developed throughout. Work on using a variety of linking words to create smoother transitions between sentences and ideas. Aim for a balanced structure where the introduction clearly presents the topic, the body elaborates on the points, and the conclusion summarizes and restates your perspective effectively.

task achievement

Concerning task achievement, it is critical that you address all parts of the prompt fully. Your response should demonstrate a clear position throughout the essay. Additionally, strive to extend and support your main points with relevant, specific examples. Your conclusion should be more than a simple summary; it should reflect upon the arguments presented and your stance, offering a final, supported opinion on the issue.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
32Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

351 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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People buy good products that work; therefore, advertising is unnecessary and is no more than a form of entertainment. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Levels of youth crime are increasing rapidly in most cities around the world. What are the reasons for this, and suggest some solutions.

It is important for all the cities and towns to have large outdoor , such as parks or squares. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In recent years sports stars have become increasingly famous and wealthy. For some this is a benefit, raising the profile of sports, but for others it is a negative influence. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe money is the best gift for teenegers, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out. It is pointless to try and keep them alive. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?