Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Nowadays, advertising is the best-selling or buying tool which allows

people

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to shop more if they need

products

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or not.

Although

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, many

people

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think that advertising distracts ordinary

people

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from buying unwanted

products

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, others may support that it is the best way to know about the latest

products

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which may be helpful for day-to-day life. I supported the advertisement that provides the latest features of

products

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and

this

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essay will give appropriate reasons with examples in the following paragraphs.

To begin

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with social media through advertising, is an easy way to get to know about the product if you want to buy in the future.

This

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means that you can pre-plan to manage a financial situation to purchase an iPhone or laptop for business purposes.

For instance

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, many travellers who travel solo trips with the help of advertising before pre-planning purchase useful

products

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which would be helpful to have on the solo trip

such

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as camping kits, lights, and so on.

Thus

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, it is crystal clear that advertising can benefit individuals to shop right

products

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to improve their lives.

Moreover

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, offline advertising was

also

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quite popular in many areas where technology had not arrived

such

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as big posters of brands'

products

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which are coming soon. Because of

this

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advertisement, poor

people

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go to the shopping centre to see if

such

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types of

products

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are worth it or not so that they can have more information to compare the

products

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with other brands to purchase less expense.

Hence

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, paper-based advertising

also

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more attention individuals about new arrival

products

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. In conclusion, types of advertising could be better guides to consumers who shop rarely or usually. I would

also

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consider my support to advertisement companies that update individuals to get more ideas about all

product's

Change noun form

product

show examples

features

availability

Replace the word

available

show examples

in the country.

patelhardik2199Thu Dec 21 2023

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coherence cohesion

The essay introduces the topic and offers a position, but the development of ideas lacks depth. Ideas are not fully expanded upon, and the essay could benefit from a wider range of sentence structures and connectors.

task achievement

While the essay touches on both sides of the argument, it would benefit from a clearer and more detailed thesis statement. More elaboration and specific examples are needed to strengthen the main points.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

297 words

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