it is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. do you think the advantages of taking risks utweigh the disadvantages?

#people #risks #lives #utweigh

Nowadays, many people are confronted with new choices in their professional or personal lives, some of which involve

risks

while

others are more conventional. In

this

essay, I will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of

this

subject.

Firstly

, in professional lives,

such

as clerical work, when there is no improvement, individuals should consider taking

risks

and exploring new job opportunities,

such

as ownership or a higher position. These options may come with additional bonuses,

such

as flexible hours, increased income, and the chance to work with new colleagues.

Secondly

, in personal lives, a majority of people tend to plan for a better future during their retirement. They often invest in various assets,

such

as purchasing gold pieces, lands, or cars.

However

, accepting these

risks

comes with specific dangers.

For instance

, a wrong investment can lead to the loss of assets, or if individuals leave their jobs without a solid plan, they may face financial problems

due to

unpaid bills. In conclusion, taking

risks

can lead to a better future or

job

Correct article usage

a job

show examples

with more benefits, rather than avoiding

risks

altogether.

However

, it is crucial to note that these decisions should be made at suitable times and in appropriate situations

Submitted by sinaazimifar on Fri Dec 22 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that the introduction and conclusion are both clear and restate your main points effectively. This enhances the overall coherence of your essay.

coherence cohesion

Develop a more logical structure by arranging your ideas and paragraphs in a clear, linear manner, which makes it easier for the reader to follow your arguments.

coherence cohesion

Each body paragraph should have one clear main idea, supported by detailed examples and further explanation. Avoid general statements without concrete examples.

task achievement

Fully address all parts of the task by providing a more detailed analysis of the advantages and disadvantages of taking risks, ensuring a balanced discussion of both sides.

task achievement

Clarify and expand upon your ideas to make your essay more persuasive and comprehensive, allowing the reader to fully understand your viewpoint.

task achievement

Incorporate more relevant and specific examples to support your points. This gives your essay more authority and a strong illustrative backing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

198 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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it is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. do you think the advantages of taking risks utweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The working week should be shorted and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that the Internet is responsible for destroying social skills of teenagers and young adults. What impact does the internet have on the social skills of teenagers and young adults and what can be done to make sure that it does not harm their social development?

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult,such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic. What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

it is predicted that robots are going to become increasingly important in our lives. how could robots be used in the future? will this be a positive or negative development?