You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The bar chart shows the participation of children is selected leisure activities in Australia. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

#minutes #bar #participation #children #leisure #activities #australia #information #features #comparisons

The graph indicates the level of

participation

in various leisure

activities

between Australian

boys

and

girls

aged 5 to 14 years old. It shows what percentage of each group

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

enjoyed these

activities

, and shows which

activities

are more popular by gender. In general, the

boys

this

age group engage in a higher number of included leisure

activities

than the

girls

, with higher

participation

levels in all

activities

except

art

Fix the agreement mistake

arts

show examples

and

craft

Fix the agreement mistake

crafts

show examples

. As we can see, watching TV and videos is the most popular activity for children in

this

age group with 100% of the

boys

and

girls

surveyed having been involved. The least popular activity

overall

is skateboarding/roller-blading, as it saw the lowest

overall

participation

rate amongst the

boys

and

girls

, at around 38% and 28% respectively. The

boys

show a preference for electronic games, which were enjoyed by 80% of them, and outdoor

activities

such

as bike riding,

which

Change preposition

in which

show examples

70% of all

boys

surveyed had participated

Change preposition

apply

show examples

. They were less interested in arts and crafts. The

girls

on the other hand

took part in bike riding, electronic games, and

art

Fix the agreement mistake

arts

show examples

and

craft

Fix the agreement mistake

crafts

show examples

at similar rates, with all at around 60%

participation

Submitted by dentdent4 on Fri Dec 22 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words participation, activities, boys, girls with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.

▼

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

194 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The bar chart shows the participation of children is selected leisure activities in Australia. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

In many countries, plastic shopping bags are the main source of rubbish. They cause water and land pollution, and so they should be banned. To what extent do you agree with this statement

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Television advertising directed towards young children (aged two to five) should not be allowed.

some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation,such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money.others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.discuss both these view and give your own opinion.

Only government action can solve housing shortages in big cities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, celebrities are more known for their glamour and wealth than their accomplishments and this is setting a bad example for the youngsters. Do you agree or disgaree with the statement ?