Some people think that social networking sites have a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Due to
current technological advancement, especially the usage of social networking
sites
has rapidly increased. Many
people
argue that it has negative repercussions on individuals and
society
.
However
, I do not agree with
this
statement, since social networking
sites
help
people
to connect and stay updated on news and events.
First,
social networking
sites
act as a powerful platform for individuals to maintain and strengthen relationships with family or friends. Through features
such
as messaging, video calls, and photo sharing,
people
can connect with their loved ones, regardless of physical or geographical barriers.
For example
, students who pursue
master’s
Correct article usage
a master’s
show examples
degree abroad can have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
face time within seconds to communicate with their family, compared with 20 years ago
where
Correct word choice
when
show examples
students should write a letter and wait for a decade.
As a result
, social networking
sites
can enhance interpersonal connections and
fosters
Correct subject-verb agreement
foster
show examples
a sense of belonging in
this
fast-paced and globalized world.
Moreover
, social networking
sites
play a pivotal role in keeping
society
updated on news and events. They provide a
real-stream
Correct your spelling
real stream
show examples
of information which
allow
Correct subject-verb agreement
allows
show examples
individuals to stay informed about local and global affairs.
For example
,
people
in Indonesia can have a live update about
condition
Add an article
the condition
a condition
show examples
in Palestine and
able
Add a missing verb
be able
show examples
to immediately provide
helps
Correct subject-verb agreement
help
show examples
when they know it is needed. If these social benefits happen in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
long run, it can reinforce
society
Replace the word
societal
show examples
relations and foster
prosper
Replace the word
prosperous
show examples
symbiosis.
To sum up
, though social networking
sites
may have negative impacts, we cannot ignore
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
huge positive sides. It can provide valuable means for keeping in touch with our closest
people
and
let
Verb problem
keep
show examples
society
informed about news and events, which can enrich
people
with knowledge and
forming
Wrong verb form
form
show examples
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
show examples
between
Change preposition
with
show examples
fellow citizens.
Submitted by aidafathiaa on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure a logical progression of ideas throughout the essay. Paragraphs should flow smoothly with clear and appropriate transitional phrases.
coherence cohesion
Include both an introduction and conclusion to frame your arguments. Your introduction should introduce the topic and your thesis, while the conclusion should summarize and clearly state your position once more.
coherence cohesion
Support main points with specific details, examples, and explanations to strengthen the argument. Avoid general statements without concrete backing.
task achievement
Address the task's requirements fully by thoroughly discussing the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement, ensuring a balanced and complete argument.
task achievement
Develop clear and comprehensive ideas by elaborating on your arguments with depth and complexity. Don't just state opinions; analyze them.
task achievement
Use relevant and specific examples to illustrate points. Where possible, include personal experiences, statistics, facts, or anecdotal evidence.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • social isolation
  • virtual interactions
  • mental health
  • feelings of inadequacy
  • anxiety
  • depression
  • misinformation
  • destabilize
  • privacy concerns
  • data breaches
  • productivity
  • foster connections
  • educational content
  • social activism
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