In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this idea?

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Working hard and achieving your goals is one of the major pieces of

advice

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that prevails in some of our societies,even,though

children

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are told,if they try hard,they can achieve anything.The principal advantages are self-belief, fostering a sense of resilience and determination.The main disadvantages are the creation of unrealistic

expectation

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expectations

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and feelings of disappointment. The main advantage of telling

children

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to try hard is self-belief.It is generally believed that working hard makes

children

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self reliance

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self-reliance

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and a kind of believer man.

Therefore

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it is clear that

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

advice

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helps

children

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in their lives to remain calm and confident.The second advantage of telling

children

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to work hard is to foster their sense of resilience and determination.It is considered that the struggles of

children

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,make them different and determined people.

In other words

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,it promotes a growth mindset in them.

Hence

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this

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advice

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makes them more focused on their goals. Despite these advantages,there are some major cons of

this

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saying.The first one is,that it may lead to feelings of disappointment.

In addition

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,it can lead to the

children

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to stress

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and make them discouraged.

For instance

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,in Pakistan,students in the 12 grade,work hard to get admission to medical colleges, and if they do not get entrance,they become disappointed.

Hence

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this

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piece of

advice

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is not in favour of

children

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Secondly

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this

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can lead to unrealistic expectations,if they can not achieve the goal,they get stressed.

This

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major

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a major

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drawback. In conclusion, self-belief and fostering a sense of resilience and determination can be advantageous;

however

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,they should

also

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be careful,as it can lead to the creation of unrealistic goals and feelings of disappointment.

jamalashraf45Sat Dec 23 2023

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task achievement

The essay loosely addresses the task with some relevant points, but it fails to fully develop them. The advantages and disadvantages mentioned could be more explicitly linked to the cultural presumption 'children can achieve anything if they work hard.' Expand on the ideas and illustrate them with more concrete, specific, and relevant examples to improve task achievement.

coherence cohesion

The essay has an identifiable structure but lacks clear progression in places. Work on creating more cohesive links between your main points by using a wider range of linking words beyond 'Therefore' and 'In other words'. Additionally, avoid comma splices and run-on sentences to maintain coherence and present a more structured argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

251 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Perseverance
Self-esteem
Ambitious goals
Risk of unrealistic expectations
Undue stress
Self-blame
External factors
Hard work ethic
Motivation
Limitations
Potential

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In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this idea?

Your opinion

Many poducts that we buy are made in other countries. Do the advantages of this outweight the disadvantages?

Some people say that the best way to discourage smoking is to make smoking illegal in public places. Other people say that this is not enough and other measures are needed. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Some countries have introduced laws to limit working hours for employees. Why are these laws introduced? Do you think they are a positive or negative development?

You accidentally damaged a book borrowed from the library. Write a letter to the librarian.

Write a complaint letter to the owner of a TV channel, to complain about the steady decline in the quality of their TV programmes over the last decades.