Athletes in many countries are paid extremely high salaries. Some people believe that athletes deserve their high salaries, while others think that they are paid too much money.

#athletes #countries #salaries #people #money

Many professional

athletes

in a variety of sports are paid enormous salaries. Many people argue that they earn these huge salaries,

while

others disagree that they are paid far too much. I agree that

athletes

deserve to receive

such

large salaries. Professional

athletes

train their whole lives for what

amount

Correct subject-verb agreement

amounts

show examples

to relatively short careers.

While

some basketball players have played professionally for over 20 years, the average player only lasts about 4 to 5 seasons. It is

therefore

agreed that these

athletes

have earned the high paychecks they receive.

For example

, a basketball player could train and play competitively from elementary school through university only to have an injury end their career during their first professional season. Any kind of career that requires that kind of dedication and entails

such

risk deserves high reimbursement.

However

, many disagree that professional

athletes

deserve to receive

such

high paychecks. The current minimum salary in Major League

baseball

Capitalize word

Baseball

show examples

was recently raised to $600,000 dollars.

Although

it is difficult to argue that star players do not earn their pay,

team

members

who only play in a few games a year should not receive

such

large paychecks. That being said, star

athletes

are valuable

members

of a

team

, but they cannot win games on their own. Even the players who sit on the bench most of the season have to stay in prime physical condition and be ready to play at a moment's notice. Since all

team

members

are needed for success, they should all be paid well. In conclusion,

while

some people believe that professional

athletes

earn

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

huge incomes, others feel that they are massively overpaid.

However

, as long as we consider the training and risks that all

athletes

endure, and acknowledge the value of all

team

members

, the reasons for paying all

athletes

well are easy to understand.

Submitted by dewifarraprasasya on Sun Dec 24 2023

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task achievement

Your essay presents a clear position throughout the response, but there is room for development in terms of complexity and depth. Make sure to elaborate on points with a wider range of ideas and views.

coherence cohesion

To improve coherence, ensure that paragraphs logically flow from one to the next with a clear progression of ideas. Use a variety of cohesive devices and topic sentences to guide the reader through your argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

305 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Athletes in many countries are paid extremely high salaries. Some people believe that athletes deserve their high salaries, while others think that they are paid too much money.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Instead of asking the government to bear the cost of higher education, students should pay their own tuition fees themselves. Do you agree or disagree with this statement

some people say it is important to keep your home and your workplace tidy,with everything organised and in the correct place.what is your opinion?

Government investment in the visual arts, the kind you commonly see in art galleries, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Write about the following topic. The internet has greatly increased our access to information. To what extent do you think this is a good thing? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In some countries, student pay their college or university fees, while in some others, the government pays for them. Do the advantages of governments paying for fees outweigh the disadvantages.