In some countries owning a home rather than renting one is considered very important. What are the causes of this? Is this a positive or negative development?

#countries #home #development

People

in some nations consider owning a

home

much more important than renting one. Living in a self-owned

home

gives a feeling of stability, comfort and security. In my

opinion

Add a comma

opinion,

show examples

whether it is a positive or negative

situation

depends on many factors.

People

owning a

home

do not have to worry about the landlord nor do they have to pay a monthly rent.

Hence

, they can modify their

home

according to

their needs and wants and feel secure in it. For many, the

home

is like

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

heaven and so they spend quite a fortune on designing and decorating it. Some

people

on the other hand

, consider their

home

as an investment which they expect to appreciate in value in the future. All in all, I feel that whether owning a

home

is a positive or negative

situation

is quite subjective, depending on the circumstances of the person. For

people

who have the money to buy a big

house

and few financial liabilities, their

house

is an asset and owning a

house

is a positive

situation

for them.

However

, most of the

middle class

Add a hyphen

middle-class

show examples

families buy a big

house

which is often out of their budget. They fund

this

by taking out huge loans and end up repaying the amount over a very long time.

This

increases the interest they have to pay.

In addition

this

, they have to pay property taxes and insurance which are directly proportional to the area of a

home

Furthermore

, the electricity and maintenance costs get added to their everyday expenses.

To conclude

, I feel that owning a

home

can be a pleasurable experience if done within a budget.

However

, it could turn into a negative

situation

when a person buys a

home

by getting a loan

that is

way beyond his repaying capacity.

Submitted by ranayogesh5050 on Mon Dec 25 2023

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introduction

You should create a stronger and clearer introduction, where you outline your main points and clearly state your opinion on the topic.

supported main points

Develop your body paragraphs with more specific examples and data to support your ideas. Each paragraph should focus on a single cause or aspect of the discussion.

logical structure

The essay structure requires improvements. Aim to have a clear progression of ideas, and use cohesive devices to guide the reader more effectively through your arguments.

complete response

Make sure to address both parts of the essay question. Discuss the causes comprehensively and also provide a balanced view on whether it is a positive or negative development, with clear reasons.

relevant specific examples

Incorporate precise and relevant examples that directly support your ideas, preferably from a variety of sources or personal experiences.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

300 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

cultural norms
symbol of success
long-term investment
financial security
asset appreciation
personal autonomy
modify surroundings
social significance
tax deductions
generational wealth
community engagement
housing bubble
real estate market
economic stability
mortgage financing

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In some countries owning a home rather than renting one is considered very important. What are the causes of this? Is this a positive or negative development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Modern technology has made it easier for individuals to download copyrighted music and book from the internet for no charge. To what extent is this a positive or a negative development?

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Fatherhood ought to be emphasized as much as motherhood

Some people think there should be free health care for all people, but others disagree. Discuss both sides.