In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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In
the
Correct article usage
apply
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global life, the number of
people
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who are living in cities
are
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is
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increasing rapidly.
Along with
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the rise of population, the
improving
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improvement
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in
techonology
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technology
and the
prorities
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priorities
of convenience are now
paid
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paying
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many attentions
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much attention
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,
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transport
Correct article usage
the transport
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system particularly. Some
belief
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believe
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that government should invest in building
railway
Correct article usage
a railway
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,
while
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others
belive
Correct your spelling
believe
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that improving public
transport
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is more important. In my personal, I agree that fast train will make life easier and more convenient. On the one hand, railway lines move high so there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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no
obtacles
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obstacles
obstacle
or traffic congestion in there.
People
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can reach
the
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their
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destination quickly
with
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at
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the
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an
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affordable price.
For example
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, if we travel by vehicles
such
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as buses or taxies, it could
takes
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take
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them 15’ to 30’ to get there, but when we use
mega
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the mega
show examples
speedy railway, the time will be shortened and it can help
people
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not to miss an important appointment or late for work.
Moreover
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,
this
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means of trains can
also
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protect the environment as it is run by electricity – a friendly environmentally power. Protecting nature is the main purpose and
also
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be
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apply
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a global issue nowadays.
For example
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, Viet Nam is considered
being
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to be
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one of the
most
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apply
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countries that has a high rate of
evironmental
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environmental
pollution and the speedy trains project meets all of these needs.
On the other hand
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, I think the road systems is
also
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a great project,
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however
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however,
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it has some drawbacks affecting on the
people
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lives. Public
transport
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is run
by
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on
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fuel and it can lead to air pollution.
Furthermore
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,
people
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usually meet the congestion phenomenon when they move at rush hour as each
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people
Fix the agreement mistake
person
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has their own means of
transport
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and
this
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can be a limitation for
cities
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city
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dwellers. In conclusion,
metropolis
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metropolises
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are now
concered
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concerned
with the changing of the
transports
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transport
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for commuters.
However
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, the
governemnt
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government
need
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needs
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to
be
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apply
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set out some policies and provide
economic
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an economic
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boon to
develop
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developing
show examples
their countries.
Submitted by nguyencamnhi on

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structure
Ensure that your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Your introduction should clearly state the topic and your position. Body paragraphs need clear topic sentences, followed by support and examples. The conclusion should summarize your main points and restate your position clearly.
development
Develop your paragraphs properly. Each paragraph should have one clear main idea, and every subsequent sentence should add information or analysis that supports that idea. Avoid introducing unrelated topics within the same paragraph.
cohesion
Link your ideas and paragraphs with transition words and phrases to make your reasoning easier to follow. Logical connectors such as 'however', 'therefore', and 'for example' can help with the flow of the essay but use them appropriately and vary your language.
task response
Address all parts of the task. The essay needs a balanced discussion of both views and your own opinion. Ensure you give equal attention to discussing both the construction of new fast railway lines and the improvement of existing public transport.
examples
Support your ideas with specific reasons and examples. Your arguments will be more convincing if you include specific examples, facts, or statistics. Avoid making general statements without supporting evidence.
grammar
Work on grammatical accuracy and range of structures. Your writing contains several grammatical errors and awkward constructions, which impede understanding. Proofread your work, and pay attention to sentence structure, verb forms, and article usage.
vocabulary
Use a wider range of vocabulary. Try to articulate your ideas using a variety of words and phrases to avoid repetition and demonstrate lexical resource.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • infrastructure
  • efficient
  • congestion
  • sustainable
  • environmentally friendly
  • connectivity
  • economic growth
  • public transportation
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