some people think the manufacturers and shopping malls should sell fewer packaged products while others argue that people have the responsibilty to buy products with less packaging. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #manufacturers #malls #products #responsibilty

Nowadays, many individuals argue that

manufactures

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manufacturers

show examples

and shopping malls should

purches

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purchase

purchases

little

plastic

packaged items;

whereas

other

Fix the agreement mistake

others

show examples

consider that

society

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

the responsibility to buy products with less

plastic

packaging.

Overall

this

essay will provide my opinion about

Correct article usage

the prons

show examples

prons

Correct your spelling

pros

show examples

and cons

using

Change preposition

of using

show examples

produsts

Correct your spelling

products

product

packaging in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

public areas

such

the

Change preposition

as the

show examples

behaviour of using

plastic

. Advocate for using

plastic

in public

area

Fix the agreement mistake

areas

show examples

for

seller

Fix the agreement mistake

sellers

show examples

, there are several impacts.

Firtsly

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Firstly

, if

incereasing

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increasing

interesting

people who

using

Wrong verb form

use

show examples

plastic

after buying

someting

Correct your spelling

something

manufacture

Wrong verb form

manufacturing

show examples

will rise significantly

Change preposition

show examples

waste

plastict

Correct your spelling

plastic

plastics

However

, the

goverment

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government

should collaborate with some

stakeholder

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stakeholders

show examples

for making

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to make

show examples

activity

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activities

show examples

for reducing

Change preposition

to reduce

show examples

rubbish

such

as doing

Add an article

the campaign

a campaign

show examples

campaign

Fix the agreement mistake

campaigns

show examples

Secondly

, the management of

manufactures

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manufacturers

show examples

and shopping

mall

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malls

show examples

making

Wrong verb form

make

show examples

regulation

Fix the agreement mistake

regulations

show examples

with

Correct article usage

the collage

show examples

collage

Correct your spelling

college

show examples

such

reseller encoraged

Verb problem

encouraging

show examples

consumen

Correct your spelling

consumers

using

Wrong verb form

use

show examples

handbag

Fix the agreement mistake

handbags

show examples

when selling in area

mall

Fix the agreement mistake

malls

show examples

Furthermore

, the impact of the

regulation

will

decline

Verb problem

decrease

show examples

society

Change noun form

society's

show examples

using

Wrong verb form

use of

show examples

plastic

packaging.

Lastly

, making

regulation

about

panisment

Correct your spelling

punishment

for

society

waste rubbish in

public

Add an article

a public

the public

show examples

area.

Moreover

, it will reduce

behaviour

Add an article

the behaviour

show examples

of waste rubbish.

On the other hand

behaviour

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the behaviour

show examples

of using

plastic

bag

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bags

show examples

for

consument

Correct your spelling

consumption

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

improving knowledge of

impact

Correct article usage

the impact

show examples

over

Change preposition

show examples

taking

plactic

Correct your spelling

plastic

In contrast

lowesly

Replace the word

low levels

show examples

of education and

knowlegde

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knowledge

of reducing

plactic

Correct your spelling

plastic

product

Fix the agreement mistake

products

show examples

are making people less care about

environment

Add an article

the environment

show examples

For example

, the

kompas news

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Kompas News

show examples

found that the level of recycling

plastic

product

Fix the agreement mistake

products

show examples

Correct article usage

the bigest

show examples

bigest

Change the word

biggest

show examples

city

decline

Wrong verb form

declined

show examples

significantly from 2022 to 2023

due to

the

goverment

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government

upsupport

Correct your spelling

up support

support

the

Change preposition

of the

show examples

requipment

Correct your spelling

equipment

requirement

for recycling

plastic

. In

conlusion

Correct your spelling

conclusion

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

manufactures

Correct your spelling

manufacturers

show examples

and shopping malls sell

fewer

Correct quantifier usage

less

show examples

plastic

due to

the buyer and

seller

Fix the agreement mistake

sellers

show examples

are less

knowlegde

Correct your spelling

knowledge

Change preposition

about

show examples

using

plactic

Correct your spelling

plastic

and impacting for

envoirement

Correct your spelling

environment

Moreover

. some

stakeholder

Fix the agreement mistake

stakeholders

show examples

should

collaborete

Correct your spelling

collaborate

for making

Change preposition

to make

show examples

regulation

Fix the agreement mistake

regulations

show examples

for

society

Submitted by musa.nuwa on Wed Dec 27 2023

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Task Achievement

To improve Task Achievement, ensure that you fully address all parts of the task. Your response must provide a clear discussion of both views and state your own opinion. Try to develop each point with a clear, focused argument, supported by specific examples or evidence.

Coherence & Cohesion

For better Coherence and Cohesion, work on organizing your ideas more logically and clearly. Use a range of cohesive devices effectively (e.g., conjunctions, lexical phrases) to connect sentences and paragraphs, and structure your essay into clear paragraphs (introduction, body, conclusion). Pay attention to paragraphing, as this will enhance the readability and flow of your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
77Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

266 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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some people think the manufacturers and shopping malls should sell fewer packaged products while others argue that people have the responsibilty to buy products with less packaging. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Parents of obese children should be punished for making them fat. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that what children watch on television influences their behaviour. Others say that amount of time spent watching TV influences their behaviour. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people think that the environment may be destroyed because of tourism. Others, however, believe that it is a way to preserve nature. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

people naturally resist making changes in their lives. What kind of problems of problems can this cause? Whats solutions you can suggest?

Some people think that because children find subjects such as mathematics and philosophy difficult, they ought to be optional instead of compulsory. To what extent do you agree?