Pollution of rivers, lakes and seas is a major concern for people who seek to protect the environment. What are the possible causes of water pollution, and what effects does this have on animal life and human society? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Nowadays,
environment
problems Replace the word
environmental
such
as water
and air pollution
are a
significant Correct article usage
apply
issue
for all Fix the agreement mistake
issues
people
and animal life
. Some of the people
concern
about Add a missing verb
are concern
this
trouble whereas
others do not worn
it. Change the verb form
wear
However
, especially water
and watery
Replace the word
water
resource
have a considerable impact Fix the agreement mistake
resources
in
our Change preposition
on
life
. I Fix the agreement mistake
lives
aware
of Add a missing verb
am aware
water
pollution
and will explain my perspective with more detail and some examples.
First and foremost, nature
resources play Replace the word
natural
significant
role in all biogeography. Most of the Add an article
a significant
people
do not have consciousness and especially they can throw away their rubbish in water
or anywhere. The garbages
which thrown into the Correct subject-verb agreement
garbage
water
adversly
affects the Correct your spelling
adversely
life
of aquatic organisms. Particularly, in order to wastes
Wrong verb form
waste
in
watery resources Change preposition
apply
such
as seas, oceans and lakes absorb by fishes in this
case these fishes conclude
intensive heavy Verb problem
consume
metal
. Fix the agreement mistake
metals
In addition
, societies that consume these fish are affected by heavy metals such
as mercury, molybdenum and arsenic. These metals can cause cancer when consumed for a long time. For example
, according to
WHO (World Health Organization), it has been determined that the death rate due to
heavy metals in the world is on average 1 million per year.
Secondly
, the major cause of water
pollution
is industrial and agricultural activities. Industries often release toxic chemicals and polllutants
into Correct your spelling
pollutants
water
and
leading to contamination. Correct word choice
apply
Similarly
, agricultural practices include
Wrong verb form
including
the
fertilizers, pesticides and herbicides contribute to Correct article usage
apply
pollution
. For instance
, the discharge of industrial wastewater containing some harmful chemicals such
as,
rock oil, asbestos and cyanide into rivers can have devastating effects on aquatic Remove the comma
apply
life
and pose serious health risks to human and animal populations. Fix the agreement mistake
Animals
Animal
that Fix the agreement mistake
Animals
drink
these untreated waters are found dead on the lakesides, sometimes millions of them a year.
In conclusion, Change the verb form
drinks
water
pollution
is a growing problem caused by industrial, agricultural activities and inorganic waste by thrown
Verb problem
apply
people
, inadequate waste management. However
, with some regulations and improved waste managaement
systems, we can prevent Correct your spelling
management
water
pollution
and protect our water
recources
.Correct your spelling
resources
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coherence cohesion
Your essay needs to have a clearer overall logical structure. Ideas can be better organized, with clear paragraphs that each have a central topic. Make sure your introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion each serve their purpose effectively.
coherence cohesion
You should introduce the topic in the first paragraph by restating the question and clearly stating what you will discuss. In the body paragraphs, ensure each main point is supported with relevant examples or explanations. The conclusion should summarize your main points and restate your overall opinion or suggest a solution.
task achievement
To fully respond to the task, ensure that you present clear and comprehensive ideas that directly relate to the causes and effects of water pollution. Your explanations need to be more developed, with a wider range of vocabulary and a clear position throughout the essay.
task achievement
Make sure to include relevant examples to support your main points. The examples given are good but need to be backed up with more specifics and possibly data to show the broader impact on animal life and human society.