Some people say that increasing business and cultural contacts between countries is a positive development, while others think that many countries will lose their national identities as a result. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #business #contacts #countries #development #identities

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From my perspective, I contend that the increasing connection between countries can be

benefical

Correct your spelling

beneficial

. In conclusion, I believe that it is essential to save our earth for our future from all manmade harm by giving awareness classes to society and making them understand the

repercussion

Fix the agreement mistake

repercussions

show examples

if it is not sheltered .

Submitted by xianghuikong2023 on Wed Dec 27 2023

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task achievement

The essay provided is significantly underlength and does not fulfil the requirements of the IELTS writing task 2. A complete essay should include an introduction, at least two main body paragraphs discussing both views, and a conclusion that restates your opinion.

coherence and cohesion

The text lacks clear and logical progression of ideas. Ensure that your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs that address the prompt, and a conclusion that summarizes the essay and restates your opinion. Use cohesive devices to connect ideas and paragraphs.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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0
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

2 paragraphs

51 words

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Some people say that increasing business and cultural contacts between countries is a positive development, while others think that many countries will lose their national identities as a result. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Some commentators feel that grandparents should live together with their children and grandchildren, while others say that elderly people should be encouraged to live independently. Consider the possible arguments on both sides of this debate, and reach your own conclusion.

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development

You saw an advert in the newspaper asking for volunteers to help run a charity event. Write a letter of application to the organizers. In your letter: -explain why you are interested in helping -Give details suitable past experience -suggest ways you might help with the event.

In some countries, some school leavers choose to work or travel for a year between finishing secondary school and attending university.

With the improvements in today’s health care, society has to care for more and more elderly people. Do you feel that society will be able to cope with the increase in numbers of elderly people today and how can it be managed?