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Band 2

In the future, nobody will buy printed newspaper or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

#future #nobody #newspaper #books
It is a fact that nobody will purchase printed
newspapers
 and
books
 because they will read everything they want online and
free
Change preposition
for free
show examples
.
Although
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 there are many advantages to
this
, I disagree with it. On the one hand, there are some advantages to having digital
newspapers
 and
books
.
Firstly
, it prevents deforestation. To
producing
Wrong verb form
produce
show examples
papers
Fix the agreement mistake
paper
show examples
, many trees are cut every day. So, it helps to prevent
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
cutting trees.
Secondly
, these kinds of
books
 and
newspapers
 provide more comfort for us because it is much easier to carry them.
On the other hand
, there are many disadvantages to reading online without paying.
Firstly
, it has a bad effect on society and
economy
Correct article usage
the economy
show examples
 because many jobs will
be destroy
Change the verb form
be destroyed
show examples
 during
this
.
Thus
, the rate of unemployment will increase.
Also
, reading digital
books
 freely can lead to cultural damage. The enthusiasm of writers will
decreased
Change the verb form
decrease
be decreased
show examples
,
as
Correct word choice
and as
show examples
 a result, fewer works will be published. In conclusion, digital
books
 and
newspapers
 are easy to carry and can prevent
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
cutting the trees.
However
, more people will be unemployed and
also
 discourage writers
for
Change preposition
from
show examples
 writing and publishing new
thimgs
Correct your spelling
things
.
Submitted by kk.1379 on

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structure
Your essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion that distinctly outline your viewpoint and summarize your main arguments. Consider using a more traditional structure with a clear thesis statement at the end of the introduction and a restating of your main points in the conclusion.
cohesion
Your essay presents ideas in a somewhat logical sequence, but transitions between paragraphs can be improved. Use cohesive devices, such as conjunctions and transitional phrases, to better link sentences and paragraphs.
development
While you address some main points, ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that each point is fully developed with specific examples. Expand on your ideas by providing more detailed explanations and evidence where possible.
task response
The task response is only adequate. Your argument is somewhat one-sided and you need to address the question more directly. Explicitly state to what extent you agree or disagree with the statement in the prompt, and do so consistently throughout the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Technological advancements
  • Digital content
  • Environmental concerns
  • Tactile experience
  • Production costs
  • Distribution costs
  • Digital divide
  • Digital fatigue
  • Print media
  • Credibility
  • Permanence
  • Collectibility
  • Aesthetic value
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