IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Due to the growth of the Internet, newspaper publishers will soon stop printing paper editions. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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In
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
apply
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recent years,
Internet
Add an article
the Internet
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 has been widely used by many people around the world. Even many people acclimatize to read daily
news
Use synonyms
 on
Use synonyms
website
Add an article
the website
show examples
. In my opinion, I agree that publishers which produce physical
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
show examples
 are predicted to become obsolete and replaced online. Analyzing the conveniences of online
news
Use synonyms
,
as well as
Linking Words
 the constant updating will elucidate
this
Linking Words
 argument. The prevalence of
news
Use synonyms
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
published on
Use synonyms
website
Fix the agreement mistake
websites
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 could
give
Verb problem
apply
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benefit
for
Change preposition
apply
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consumers because they could read anywhere.
For instance
Linking Words
, workers who commute
with
Change preposition
by
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 public transportation
are
Verb problem
apply
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encountered
Replace the word
encounter
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 limited
of
Change preposition
apply
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time during weekdays. The
emerging
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emergence
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 of online
news
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application
Fix the agreement mistake
applications
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 on their phone could help office
worker
Fix the agreement mistake
workers
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to
Verb problem
apply
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keep up-to-date
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 recent
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
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 when they are on the bus or train.
As a consequence
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, many employees, who
mainly
Add a missing verb
are mainly
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 publisher's consumers, prefer to pay their monthly subscription online rather than buying the newspaper in the store. Updating
news
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 on the
website
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 is faster than printing paper.
For example
Linking Words
, sophisticated broadcasting
company
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companies
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such
Linking Words
 as BBC could disseminate the most updated
news
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 on their
website
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 within just a second.
Thus
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, groundbreaking
news
Use synonyms
 could be informed to all people
accross
Correct your spelling
across
 the world quickly with less paper. In conclusion,
practical
Correct article usage
the practical
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 usage of digital
newspaper
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newspapers
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 and
real time
Add a hyphen
real-time
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 updating for customers could be the reason why publisher companies will alter physical
news
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 to online
news
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.
After
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this
Linking Words
 thorough analysis
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
this
Linking Words
 subject, it is predicted that printing paper will be redundant and publishers will
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
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focus
to invest
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on investing
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digital
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in digital
show examples
application
Fix the agreement mistake
applications
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 to attain massive cost
saving
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savings
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 in the future.

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Introduction & Conclusion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which is positive. However, it's important to ensure that these sections are not only present but also effectively introduce and summarize your main points.
Range & Complexity of Language
You have presented a clear opinion which is good for task achievement, but your response would be strengthened with a wider range of sentence structures and more complex grammatical forms to convey your ideas.
Supporting Examples
It's essential that your essay includes specific examples to support the points made. While you provided examples, more detailed and relevant examples would enrich your arguments.
Paragraphing & Cohesion
Make sure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences within the paragraph clearly support that idea. Your paragraphs have structure, but they can benefit from more explicit topic sentences and smoother transitions between ideas.
Logical Argumentation
Keep working on logical structuring of your arguments. It is positively noted that you tried to create logical connections; however, the links can be enhanced by avoiding repetition and by having a better progression of ideas from one sentence to another.
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