IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The plan below shows the village of Pebbleton 20 years ago and now.

#plan #village #pebbleton #years
The diagrams illustrate some changes in the village of
Pebbleton
 20 years ago and at present.
Overall
, the village has changed considerably with seven new features including houses, a footpath, a footbridge, a community centre, flats, a children’s playground and tennis courts in the second diagram. A deep analysis of the second map provided reveals there are three new houses to be built.
In addition
, the old fort in the northwest of
Pebbleton
 is replaced by a children’s playground. Other facilities that have been added are a community centre in between houses and a children’s playground. As can be seen in the new map, it is noticeable that a tennis court was built beside the lighthouse lane in the centre of
Pebbleton
. Meanwhile, a film studio in the southwest is replaced by the flats and there is a newly constructed footpath and a footbridge connecting to the school on the Coast Road near the river bank located in the south of
Pebbleton
.
Submitted by yeshomeclass on

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coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, ensure that your essay is well-organised, with clear paragraphs and for each idea or change introduced, use linking words or phrases effectively to create flow. Consider adding a concluding paragraph to summarise the changes.
task achievement
To improve task achievement, expand your coverage of the visual information given. Offer comparisons where relevant and provide more detailed descriptions for each of the changes. A conclusion summarising the overall changes is also missing which could consolidate the essay's content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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