Some people work for the same organization all their working life. Others think it is better to work for different organisations. Discuss both the views anf give your opinion.
Some
people
work
for only one company until retire. Others believe that it is better to work
for different employers. In this
essay, I will argue that it is beneficial to the employee's working ability and skills when they are employed in diverse organizations.
One clear advantage of working for more than one workplace is that it allows the worker to acquire new experiences
. This
is because new hires will get in variety of trainings
, Change the wording
training
pieces of training
as well as
to
be familiar with different operation styles. As Fix the infinitive
apply
the
result, Correct article usage
a
experiences
and knowledge that Correct article usage
the experiences
people
gain from working for various cooperations
will enhance their working ability for future career growth. Correct your spelling
corporations
For instance
, many CEO in the
large organizations have been employed by a lot of companies throughout their working life. Correct article usage
apply
Hence
, the more firms that people
work
for, the more experiences
they can obtain.
Fix the agreement mistake
experience
Additionally
, working for many workplaces strengthen
Correct subject-verb agreement
strengthens
people
flexibility and adaptability. Change noun form
people's
As
joining a new company, Correct word choice
When
people
have to adapt themselves to get a long
well in the new environment and with new co-workers. Correct your spelling
along
This
enables capability
to handle any changes Add an article
the capability
happen
to their job. Correct pronoun usage
that happen
For example
, if a company lays off their staffs
, the person who had Fix the agreement mistake
its staff
working
Replace the word
work
experiences
in various companies will get a new job faster than those Fix the agreement mistake
experience
did
not. Correct pronoun usage
who did
This
is the reason why many people
change their jobs more often.
In conclusion, it is better to work
for many organizations as it enhance
Change the verb form
enhances
people
potential to grow their Change noun form
people's
career
. Fix the agreement mistake
careers
Also
, this
allow
workers to cope with any unexpected changes Change the verb form
allows
occur
in the Correct pronoun usage
that occur
workplaces
.Fix the agreement mistake
workplace
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coherence cohesion
The essay presents a logical structure, but transitions between ideas could be smoother to improve connectivity.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are both present, but they could be strengthened by being more engaging and concise.
coherence cohesion
You have supported your main points, but incorporating a wider range of cohesive devices and paragraphing strategies could enhance clarity.
task achievement
You addressed the task sufficiently; however, exploring a broader range of ideas and deepening the analysis could enhance the response.
task achievement
The ideas within the essay are clear, but striving for greater depth and complexity would lead to a more comprehensive treatment of the subject matter.
task achievement
Relevant examples are provided but aim to include more specific and varied examples to support your points more convincingly.
