Some people work for the same organisation all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organisations.

#people #work #organisation #life #organisations

There is no doubt that the

workplace

plays a crucial role in the staff’s

life

However

, some folks possess

this

idea that they must dedicate all of their working

life

to the same organisation, I would agree with some who argue that experiencing various organisations is much better for many reasons.

Firstly

, the

workplace

has dominant and noticeable impacts on employees’ work future and their prosperities.

This

is because mostly they are restricted to one

workplace

and they can not have another

job

with the aim of boosting their incomes; so their

life

conditions and financial states are completely related to that

job

. In some cases, organisations provide no room for promotion whether in their work positions or payments.

As a result

, people spend all of their lives without any imperative success;

furthermore

, their salaries are approximately steady and they hardly get a chance to promote themselves.

On the other hand

, I believe working in different systems is a golden key which encourages individuals to set high standards for themselves in terms of income and

job

promotion. It is explicit that working in several places broads their minds and increases their knowledge which is highly beneficial.

For instance

, working in numerous fields causes people to face new problems and challenges that help them to apply for better jobs.

Furthermore

, not only definitely is changing

workplace

great with the matter of climbing the career ladder, but

also

it is good for

mental

Add an article

the mental

a mental

show examples

situation as it leads to making new friends. In conclusion,

although

it is critical to have a stable

job

condition so as to guarantee

life

, I suppose a changing

workplace

has merits namely having a chance of promotion and, a better wealth situation.

Submitted by n97.mortazian on Fri Dec 29 2023

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task achievement

Ensure that all aspects of the prompt are addressed with a balanced view and try to include more varied and specific examples to support main points.

coherence cohesion

Maintain logical ordering of ideas and paragraphs. Make sure to use a variety of cohesive devices and transition words to enhance the flow of the essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

284 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Longevity
Corporate ladder
Adaptability
Comfort zone
Professional network
Diverse skill set
Industry exposure
Innovation
Resilience
Seniority
Job market
Career trajectory
Company culture
Professional growth
Job security
Promotion prospects
Cross-functional experience

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Some people work for the same organisation all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organisations.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that the most practical way to become a professional is to gain practical experience in this field. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve the growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?

Some think that ambition is a good quality. Is it important to be ambitious? Is it a positive or negative characteristic?

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to share freely.Discuss both views and give your own opinion.