Some people state that in the period of developed IT, it is normal for teenagers to spend a lot of time on such modern gadgets as smart phones and laptops, while others say that it is a bad habit with negative consequences. Discuss both views and state your opinion.

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this

Linking Words

modern world, students are tremendously using advanced technology-based

gadgets

Use synonyms

such

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as cell phones and computers which is normal to some people, whilst others say that it is harmful for youngsters as they spend a long time on them. in

this

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essay, I will explore both views by focusing on some vital points and stating my personal opinion. to commence with,

due to

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several enhancements in technology, it is more convenient for education

institution

Fix the agreement mistake

institutions

show examples

so that pupils

get

Verb problem

apply

show examples

opt

Change preposition

for

show examples

them when every class are conducted with advanced

gadgets

Use synonyms

such

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as projectors and laptops.

in addition

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, their homework will be based on some apps which must be running on mobile phones or computers.

for instance

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, if teachers do use Microsoft Excel to solve various equations, students tend to be

an users

Correct the article-noun agreement

users

a user

show examples

of Microsoft Excel when doing academic work at home.

hence

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, in

this

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way, parents are less surprised when children used to spend more and more time on

such

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advanced applications at home.

therefore

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, guardians are fearless even if they are not active in social activities.

on the other hand

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, without modern touch

such

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as a video projector, it is impossible nowadays to teach everyone in a big hall room, after

all

Add the comma(s)

all,

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students have fun

while

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they are taught the way they like.

furthermore

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, to reduce abuse and crime rates at college , management would like to have

Change preposition

apply

show examples

every student's details on their database by using computers.

also

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, parents are able to know about their children's history. eventually, modern

gadgets

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are undeniable to improve educational structure. the prevalence of using laptops and cell phones

Verb problem

has

show examples

increased to easy access every different websites so that learners can gain more ideas about academic topics.

to sum up

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although

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it is an addiction for youngsters to run various gaming apps on smartphones,

instead

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of using education-related software. I think parents should be more alert and focused on their children , and convince them to spend time on advanced

gadgets

Use synonyms

for study purposes only to avoid negative effects on them.

farjanaakterrikta8Fri Dec 29 2023

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coherence cohesion

The logical structure of the essay needs improvement, as the ideas presented are not consistently clear and the transitions between them can be more fluid. It is essential to ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that the subsequent sentences support that idea.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are present, which is positive. However, they should more effectively introduce the topic and summarize the main points while clearly stating your opinion. The essay would benefit from stronger opening and closing statements that leave a more lasting impression on the reader.

coherence cohesion

While some main points are supported, there is a need for more developed explanations and clearer examples to enhance the arguments. The essay skims over several ideas without delving deeply into any, reducing the overall clarity of the argument. The writer should work on elaborating points with specific examples and detailed reasoning.

task achievement

The essay addresses the task and provides a response to the prompt. However, to score higher, the answer must completely address all parts of the task with a more developed and clear argument. Ensure to cover both sides of the discussion more evenly and clearly express your own opinion with sufficient justification.

task achievement

Ideas are provided but not comprehensive or fully clear. The essay should articulate points more precisely and logically. Paying attention to clarity will help the reader understand the writer's point of view more effectively.

task achievement

Relevant examples are touched upon but not fully developed. The essay would benefit from specific, relevant examples that are directly tied to the arguments made. More detailed and concrete examples will add weight to the points being discussed and enhance the overall quality of the essay.

14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

338 words

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Some people state that in the period of developed IT, it is normal for teenagers to spend a lot of time on such modern gadgets as smart phones and laptops, while others say that it is a bad habit with negative consequences. Discuss both views and state your opinion.

Some people believe that reading stories from a book is a better than watching TV or playing computers game for children to what extend do you agree

Some people think that it is better to educate boys and girls in seprate schools. Others, however, believe that boys and girls benefit more from attending mixed schools. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that children should spend all of their free time with their families. Others believe that this ia unnecessary or even negative. Discuss the possible arguments on both sides, and say which side you personally support.

Do you think consumers should avoid over packed products or is it the responsibility of the producers to avoid extra packaging of goods?