Many teenagers by encourage their parents to get a part-time job What are the advantages and the advantages of teenagers working part time?

#teenagers #parents #job #part #time

A large number of parents are motivated by their young

people

to occupation during their leisure

time

Although

an after-school

job

like Excellent pounces on the use of free

time

This

motivates some

cons

impact.In

this

Add a comma

this,

show examples

Change the capitalization

show examples

will discuss both

side

Change to a plural noun

sides

show examples

of getting a

part-

Correct your spelling

part-time

show examples

time

job

after

scoole

Correct your spelling

school

hours.

Fristly

Correct your spelling

Firstly

, one of the pros of

Remove the article

apply

show examples

part-

time

employment

is that it will give young

people

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

real life

Add a hyphen

real-life

show examples

employment

experience.

Forthemore

Correct your spelling

Furthermore

, it will help them to employ skills

such

as, how to complete an occupation entreaty, how to face well interviews and how to

work

for a supervisor.

For instance

according to

Surely Keep by the University of California the majority of teenagers who used to

work

after academies are getting their by companies than teenagers who have not had any

work

Therefore

, one of the pros of

Remove the article

apply

show examples

part-

time

employment

is it will give children

really

Change the word

real

show examples

work

experience and they can get opportunities for self-confidence.

On the other hand

, there are certain

cons

to doing a part-

time

job

for example

while

working students will not have

Change the article

apply

show examples

time

to study and finish school-related homework Because they will be exhausted and

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

will need

Change preposition

apply

show examples

time

for rest.

This

Bing is busy with a

job

while

leading might have

cons

impact on studying.

Moreover

, children who have part-

time

employment

might lost in their future studies and they totally miss their education. In conclusion, a part-

time

job

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

during school years might offer some benefits to young

people

However

, the

cons

impacts of working at a young

people

age cannot be overlooked. The study should be rejected to get a hold of a

job

if it might affect their studies and their future professional education jobs.

Submitted by manushamanu1024 on Sat Dec 30 2023

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coherence cohesion

Please ensure your essay has a logical structure, where ideas flow coherently from one paragraph to the next. Avoid disjointed arguments and make sure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next, using linking words and maintaining topic consistency.

coherence cohesion

Include an introduction and a conclusion that clearly state your position and summarise the main points of your essay. While you did provide these, make sure they are more effectively presented and better encapsulate the essence of your argument.

coherence cohesion

Work on developing your main points more thoroughly. Provide clear, elaborate explanations and well-elaborated examples that directly support your argument, increasing the persuasive power of your essay.

task achievement

Ensure that your response fully addresses all parts of the task. Your ideas should be comprehensive and cover both sides of the issue if the prompt requires it. Keep your response balanced and make sure to elaborate on your points to meet the task requirements.

task achievement

Be clear and express your ideas comprehensively. Use a range of vocabulary and sentence structures to convey precise meanings and avoid ambiguity. Aim for accuracy in grammar and word choice to enhance the quality of your argument.

task achievement

Use specific examples to support your arguments. They should be relevant and strengthen your claim. Generic examples or a lack of examples can undermine your position and result in a lower score. Make sure to integrate examples seamlessly into your argument.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

286 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many teenagers by encourage their parents to get a part-time job What are the advantages and the advantages of teenagers working part time?

A friend wants to get some information about an elementary school where one of your cousins studies. Write a letter to this friend. In your letter, •say why this school is a good elementary school •mention how expensive it is • explain why your friend should get his/her child admitted there

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Zoos are inhumane and should be abolished. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

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