Some people think that the best way to improve road safety is reducing the amount of maximum speed of vehicles. Others think that other ways exist. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. เริ่ม 12:40

In
this
contemporary world,
safety
Add an article
the safety
show examples
of
people
while
driving become
a
Change the article
an
show examples
issue of concern. It is evident that controlling the speed of cars, motorbikes, and buses will help.
However
, there are other measures
need
Correct pronoun usage
that need
show examples
to
considered
Add a missing verb
be considered
show examples
such
as speed cameras
as well as
education
of
Change preposition
about
show examples
saftey
Correct your spelling
safety
rules. I firmly believe that both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
aspects are vital. To commence with, accurate speed can reduce the risk of accidents.
For example
, studies
shows
Change the verb form
show
show examples
that most of
deaths
Add an article
the deaths
show examples
Correct pronoun usage
that happens
show examples
happens
Change the verb form
happen
show examples
on roads are the
results
Fix the agreement mistake
result
show examples
of overspeeding. It
also
causes effects to other
people
such
as road jams, late reach to destinations, and damages to other vehicles.
Therefore
, if
people
drive with
right
Correct article usage
the right
show examples
measures. It will enhance the
safety
of everyone.
On the other hand
, speed cameras play an important role.
According to
a report, Dubai is a place where
people
are
affraid
Correct your spelling
afraid
to increase the speed
due to
the
fine
Fix the agreement mistake
fines
show examples
associated.
Thus
, they have fewer damages as
comapared
Correct your spelling
compared
to other countries in the world.
Additionally
, rules and
regulation
Fix the agreement mistake
regulations
show examples
are
also
neccessary
Correct your spelling
necessary
.
While
issuing
licence
Correct article usage
a licence
show examples
there must be
brief
Correct article usage
a brief
show examples
disscussion
Correct your spelling
discussion
on the zones with minimum and maximum speed.
Such
as issuing them a booklet to read and take a test before
final
Add an article
the final
show examples
step. Which will
results
Wrong verb form
result
show examples
in learning about
roads
Change the noun form
road
show examples
safety
rules
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
extend
Replace the word
extent
show examples
. In summary, no doubt vehicles ease
citizens
Change noun form
citizens'
citizen's
show examples
lifestyle
Fix the agreement mistake
lifestyles
show examples
however
there is a topic of concern which is security on roads.
By measuing
Change preposition
Measuing
show examples
the speed
according to
kilometer
Change the spelling
kilometre
show examples
will
also
help but I think we can not deny the other
phenomenons
Replace the word
phenomena
show examples
.
Therefore
,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
should
also
impose strict actions on the victims in order to maintain
the
Change the word
their
show examples
safety
.
Submitted by kb781920 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Your essay generally has a clear position throughout the response. To improve, ensure that you fully develop your ideas with specific details and examples. Rather than making general statements, deepen your analysis to show a clear understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
You have structured your essay in a clear, logical manner with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, it could benefit from more varied sentence structures and better linking words to improve the flow of ideas. Make sure to focus on the smooth transition between ideas and paragraphs.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • road safety
  • maximum speed
  • speed limits
  • reaction time
  • stopping distance
  • fatality
  • driving habits
  • traffic education
  • road infrastructure
  • vehicle safety
  • enforcement
  • traffic laws
  • technology integration
  • traffic management
  • high-risk areas
  • strategic planning
What to do next:
Look at other essays: