Young people are often influenced in their behaviors by others in the same age group. Some argue that peer pressure is important while others feel it has distinct disadvantages. Do the disadvantages of peer pressure outweigh the advantages?

#people #behaviors #age #group #argue #peer #pressure

All youngsters are easily determined by the attitude and decency of other young adults which is

also

called

peer

pressure

Peer

pressure

has some merits and pitfalls but

this

disadvantage outweighs the advantages. In

this

essay, I will try to explain the reasons behind

this

situation. The preponderant disadvantage of

peer

pressure

is that people start to follow each other lifestyle some individuals

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

show examples

a luxurious lifestyle as they belong to rich families and other teenage friends get easily attracted to their manner of living and give trouble to their parents.

For example

, Recently there was a suicide case in India where

the

Correct article usage

show examples

child

did attempt

Wrong verb form

attempted

show examples

to kill himself as he was demanding

Change the article

show examples

iPhone from his parents as all his friends had Apple devices but his family was middle class and could not afford to buy it.

Hence

, if people start to do wrong things or make trouble for their families for a small social group in order to be liked or respected by them

then

it is a concerning matter for all the society.

However

, there are some merits of

peer

pressure

as many youngsters are spending their time with their classmates and other teens and they get influenced by each other lifestyles

such

as their dietary choices, exercise and many more which have a good impact on young people's life and health.

For instance

, in our school, there was a girl who was very fat and very fond of junk food after she started sitting with other friends. She gets influenced by their healthier preferences for their food

as well as

for lifestyle and she starts to follow their habits and loses weight.

Therefore

peer

pressure

has a good impact on other lifestyles and choices which makes life better.

Submitted by sirat on Sun Dec 31 2023

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structure

Be more mindful of essay structure, ensuring that each paragraph serves a clear purpose within the overall argument. Introductions should more effectively introduce the topic and state the writer's position, while conclusions should succinctly summarize the main points and restate the writer's stance.

coherence

Develop logical connections between your points through more effective use of linking words and phrases. This will enhance the readability and coherence of your argument.

development

Each paragraph should focus on a single main idea. Avoid overgeneralizing and ensure that each main idea is well-developed and supported with appropriate examples or evidence.

task response

You should fully address the question, discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of peer pressure in equal measure. Make sure to expand upon each point with sufficient detail and to provide a balanced argument before drawing your conclusion.

grammar

Be sure to proofread your work to correct grammatical errors and improve sentence structure for clarity. Consistently use the correct verb tenses and ensure subject-verb agreement.

vocabulary

Enhance the range and accuracy of your vocabulary to avoid repetition and to more precisely convey your ideas. Using a variety of lexical items can also demonstrate a wider language proficiency to the examiner.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

290 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

influence
behavior
age group
peer pressure
distinct
advantages
disadvantages
motivate
excel
positive behaviors
substance abuse
bullying
risky activities
belonging
acceptance
anxiety
stress
low self-esteem
conform
individuality
personal growth
decision-making skills
situations
resist
healthy balance
personal development

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Young people are often influenced in their behaviors by others in the same age group. Some argue that peer pressure is important while others feel it has distinct disadvantages. Do the disadvantages of peer pressure outweigh the advantages?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many people think that the behavior of professional sportsmen off the field is not important as long as they are good players. To what extent do you agree or disagree with it?

Some people believe that reading stories from a book is better for children than watching TV or playing computer games.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Subtleties of banking: understanding the interdependence of depositors and borrowers.

People who have original ideas are of much greater value to society than those who are simply able to copy the ideas of others well. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people claim that goverments should be responsible for taking care of the essential needs of the elderly, while others argue that it should be the elderly that should do so. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.