some people say history is one of the most important School subjects.other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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In my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
I think every
subjects
Change to a singular noun
subject
show examples
is important for us. We have to learn everything through our past, present and
future
Use synonyms
. some
people
Use synonyms
say that
History
Use synonyms
is one of the most important School subjects it's true but it has to go
along with
Linking Words
today's world which is
science
Use synonyms
and
technology
Use synonyms
. How can we move without our
history
Use synonyms
, the
people
Use synonyms
behind us ''The ancient
people
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''
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
the most powerful
people
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who
pushes
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push
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us to move forward.
The
Correct your spelling
They
show examples
taught us how to fire a light, how to find
a food
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food
a portion of food
show examples
, how to
lives
Wrong verb form
live
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with other
and
Correct word choice
apply
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animals, how to survive and others. Of
course
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course,
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we wouldn’t know that without them.
Science
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and
technology
Use synonyms
are important too. They give us a chance to move forward with them. without
science
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and
Use synonyms
technology
Add a comma
technology,
show examples
we are just normal human
being
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beings
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. we spend our daily life with no useful. Without them we have no light we have no food, we have no comfortable stuff and things. old
people
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can
survived
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survive
show examples
without these things. Human creates lots of
invention
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inventions
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to give
an unlimited wants
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unlimited wants
an unlimited want
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of
Change preposition
to
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people
Use synonyms
based on a limited government. May I
gives
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give
show examples
one example of the development of
Science
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and
Technology
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. With
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
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two things it
give
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gives
show examples
us a chance to be a member of
ASEAN
Correct article usage
the ASEAN
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'' Association of South East Asia
Nation
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Nations
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'' we can be able to communicate with other 9 countries with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
high
technology
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. It
help
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helps
show examples
us to be a TEAMWORK with the 9 other countries to develop our country
help
Correct word choice
and help
show examples
us in terms of transportation, communication, collaboration etc. It can definitely hold on to that hope
that
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apply
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in the near 
future
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.
Overall
Linking Words
economics can totally
achieves
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achieve
show examples
. it is a fact that the member of the member of the ASEAN have differences in
term
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terms
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of political standing, culture and traditions but it's not a problem with our help I know that there's a bright
future
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are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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waiting for all of us.and
that is
Linking Words
a reason why
history
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,
science
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and
Technology
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 is important. We use
History
Use synonyms
to learn about others, their culture,
their
Correct word choice
and their
show examples
tradition to
be understand
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understand
show examples
each other more and more and
using
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
Science
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and
technology
Use synonyms
to help us, our country,
our
Correct word choice
and our
show examples
world to be moving forward, to help each other and to give a bright
chances
Correct the article-noun agreement
chance
show examples
and
future
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for everyone, especially kids give a
chances
Correct the article-noun agreement
chance
show examples
to them to study, to go to school, to get knowledge so the next ten years, twenty years to the new up Coming year all of them can help each other to pass these chances to other kids go on and on.
Submitted by ilhanctg2019 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure the essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should contain one main idea with supporting details.
coherence cohesion
Use a range of connective words and phrases to show the relationship between ideas, and organize paragraphs logically.
task achievement
Fully explore both views presented in the task prompt before presenting your own opinion. Include relevant examples to support each view and your own opinion.
task achievement
Write more complex sentences and use a variety of sentence structures to articulate points more clearly.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural heritage
  • Historical perspective
  • Analytical skills
  • Contextual understanding
  • Technological advancements
  • STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Mathematics)
  • Innovation
  • Interdisciplinary
  • Job market
  • Climate crisis
  • Cultural identity
  • Critical thinking
  • Humanities
  • Contemporary issues
  • Integration
  • Tech-savvy
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