The bar chart below shows the total numbers of minutes (in billion) of telephone calls in the UK, divided into three categories from 1995 to 2002.

The bar chart below shows the total numbers of minutes (in billion) of telephone calls in the UK, divided into three categories from 1995 to 2002.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The bar chart gives us information about the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
of times a local call, national and international calls, and mobile calls could be made in the UK, from 1995 up to 8 years in a row.
Overall
Linking Words
, throughout the period of time, the majority of the UK residents use a domestic call, followed by national and international calls and
then
Linking Words
mobile calls. A fluctuation was experienced by domestic calls before it remained constant in 2002. Since 1995, a domestic call had a steady growth of around 5
billion
Use synonyms
each year and reached their peak 5 years after approximately 90
billion
Use synonyms
minutes of calls. In the early 2000s, a local call decreased by about 5
billion
Use synonyms
less and
subsequently
Linking Words
went back to early rates which are about 70
billion
Use synonyms
. A gradual increase occurred in the remained telephones. From 1995 until 2001, national and international calls made about 2
billion
Use synonyms
minutes of call
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
each year, and
finally
Linking Words
, a year later, it hit its highest point of just over 60
billion
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, 4 years in a row from 1995, a mobile call had a slight growth of about 1
billion
Use synonyms
calls every period and had a dramatic growth in the early 2000s climbing to around 15
billion
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by talithanakhwah19 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words billion with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 5 times.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • telecommunications
  • fixed line
  • mobile
  • local calls
  • national calls
  • international calls
  • trend
  • billion
  • minutes
  • increase
  • decrease
  • significant
  • fluctuate
  • peak
  • plummet
  • outpace
  • transition
  • technology advancement
  • consumer behavior
  • market saturation
What to do next:
Look at other essays: