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Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #parents #children #members #society #school #place
In today’s
interconnect
Change the form of the verb
interconnected
show examples
society
, there is a prevailing proposition that
children
 should taught by their
parents
,
whereas
 others believe that sending
children
 to educational establishments is the best
way
 for them.
Although
 both ways sound beneficial, I believe
when
Correct word choice
that
show examples
parents
 take care of their
children
 and upbringing them plays a more significant role in educating
children
 to be good members of
society
.
Schools
 and colleges can be considered relevant places for
children
 to learn to be good citizens. I think there is insufficiency in
this
 idea. In view of the fact that these institutions do not teach
children
 how to behave in
society
 to
good
Add a missing verb
be good
show examples
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
.
For example
, Samad
school
Capitalize word
School
show examples
 and Vugar
school
Capitalize word
School
show examples
 are well-known for having nurtured successful alumni
such
 as Nobel winner professor Aliyev who
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 devoted his talents
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
development
Add an article
the development
show examples
 of his country.
However
, he represents a small proportion of students attending
schools
 and
thus
 sending
children
 to
schools
 can not always
the
Add a missing verb
be the
show examples
 best idea for being good members of current
society
. I believe that
parents
 play a crucial role in teaching them how to be good human beings. At home, you can easily only focus your
children
 and teach them in
best
Add an article
the best
show examples
way
 but classes
considered
Add a missing verb
are considered
show examples
 as 25 students and
this
 is not
proper
Add an article
the proper
a proper
show examples
way
 to
teaching
Wrong verb form
teach
show examples
 them how to be
good
Add an article
a good
show examples
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
.
For instance
, the writer Elxan Elatli did not
attended
Change the verb form
attend
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
school. His
parents
 looked after him carefully and he is
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
, famous writer in his country.
To conclude
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
this
,
although
 sending
children
 to
schools
Fix the agreement mistake
school
show examples
 can be seen as
good
Change the article
a good
show examples
way
, I believe that upbringing
children
 at home
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
more
Correct article usage
a more
show examples
 positive impact​
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay has a clear and logical structure. It was observed that the essay lacks clear transitions and the organization of ideas could be improved by using cohesive devices to better link paragraphs and sentences. Additionally, consider developing your ideas further to ensure clarity and coherence throughout the essay.
task achievement
Your essay should comprehensively respond to all parts of the question. While the essay mentions both views and provides a personal opinion, the development of these ideas is lacking. Points raised are not fully elaborated, and examples, while present, are not always relevant or adequately explained. Consider expanding on each point, clearly explaining how it supports the argument you are making.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • good members of society
  • teach
  • parents
  • schools
  • responsibility
  • values
  • respect
  • empathy
  • responsibility
  • formal education
  • citizenship
  • ethics
  • social responsibility
  • lead by example
  • role models
  • conducive environment
  • extracurricular activities
  • community involvement
  • collaborate
  • holistic approach
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