The plans below show the site of an airport now and how it will look after redevelopment next year.
The floor plans depict the construction of an airport before and after the construction in the next year. It is planned to enlarge the airport with the addition of different kinds of sites. the most noticeable additions are the boarding
gates
it will be added 10 more gates
to the aeroplanes and some sky trains to help the passengers to the gates
.
In the
departures area, for now, only has a check-in counter and a cafe. Meanwhile, in the future, it will have been added a bag drop counter. Change preposition
The
Furthermore
, in the arrivals area, there is nothing inside this
building. in contrast
, next year there will be some additions such
as a café, an ATM, and a car hire service. What is more, some shops will have been built in the waiting room to convince people while
waiting for boarding time.
In conclusion, it
seems a big difference between now and later. The Correct pronoun usage
there
gates
were only 8 for this
time but later it will be 10 gates
more in the shape of letter v.Submitted by syifensaft
on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Your essay lacks a clear and logical structure, which is crucial to guide the reader through your points effectively. Consider using clear paragraphing and linking words to ensure that the flow from one idea to the next is smooth and coherent.
coherence cohesion
Although an introduction and conclusion are present, they are not effective in setting up the topic and summarizing the main points. They need to clearly state the purpose of the essay and succinctly encapsulate the key comparisons between the two plans.
coherence cohesion
Main points have been identified, but they are not fully developed or supported by detailed evidence. Make sure to elaborate on your points, explaining how and why the changes are significant.
task achievement
Your response to the task is partly complete but it lacks detail and does not fully cover all elements of the prompt. Ensure that you provide a more comprehensive and thought-out response, including all major developments and comparing them methodically.
task achievement
The ideas presented in the essay are somewhat clear, but they lack comprehensiveness. Expand on your ideas by giving more details and descriptions of the changes. This will help make the comparison clearer.
task achievement
You have used a few examples, but they are not specific or relevant enough to fully support the ideas you are presenting. Including specific details, such as how the sky trains will operate or where the additional shops will be located, can enhance your task response.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite