Many countries spend large amounts of money on world sporting events such as the Olympic Games and football World Cup. Instead these monies can be spent on encouraging young children to take up sports at a young age. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#countries #amounts #money #world #events #olympic #games #football #cup #monies #children #sports #age

In the present world,

number

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a number

the number

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of nations host different types of global

sport

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sports

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which which cost a high amount of money.Some think that

country

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the country

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has to support children first to be

attractive

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attracted

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sport

.From my perspective,

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disagree with

this

statment

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statement

and in

this

essay

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essay,

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will clarify my opinion.

firstly

,world

sport

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sports

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events might have a

larg

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large

impact

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show examples

developing the

economy

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economic

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sector in the

country

Furthermore

its

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enhance

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enhances

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the

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apply

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tourism

turism

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tourism

when people from different places come to be a part

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that event as

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a result

aresult

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a result

that can show

denamic

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dynamic

increasing in different

sector

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sectors

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for example

hotels ,

resturents

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restaurants

and market shopping all that will In conclusion,for the diverse reasons

mentiond

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mentioned

a bove

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above

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show examples

Correct article usage

apply

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gree to spend money on

sorpt

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sort

event which has a great impact

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developing the

country

from all sides.

Also

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Also,

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country

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country's

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government can

palance

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balance

between

eccouraging childern

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encouraging children

sport

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the sport

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Submitted by nooraalmalki1993 on Tue Jan 02 2024

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coherence cohesion

The essay lacks a clear logical structure, with ideas presented in a disjointed manner. The introduction and conclusion are present but are not effectively stated. Additionally, main points need to be supported with more specific details and evidence to strengthen the argument.

task achievement

The essay partially addresses the prompt, but the response is incomplete and the ideas are not developed comprehensively. The writer does not clearly agree or disagree with the statement, as the conclusion seems to contradict the introduction. To improve, ensure that your position on the statement is consistent throughout the essay and that your ideas are fully developed and supported with relevant examples.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
34Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

144 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many countries spend large amounts of money on world sporting events such as the Olympic Games and football World Cup. Instead these monies can be spent on encouraging young children to take up sports at a young age. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In some countries, it can be difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience. What do you think are the causes and effects of this problem?

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