The older generations tend to have very traditional ideas about how people should live, thank and behave. However, some people believe that these ideas are not helpful in preparing generations for modern life. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?
There is no denying the fact that all those people have pretty traditional ideas.
While
it is a commonly held belief that some people are thinking and behave
occasionally, there is Wrong verb form
behaving
the an
argument that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider that agree with Choose an article
the
an
an
old age.
Remove the article
apply
To begin
with, the
Correct article usage
apply
traditional
are associated Replace the word
traditions
by
circumstance and atmosphere period.
Change preposition
with
In other words
, ancient
AIDS the families lives as a family and they Change preposition
in ancient
cooperative
each other. Replace the word
cooperate
In addition
, they live in a small village and all thinking
Wrong verb form
think
same
Correct article usage
the same
others
and same opinions. Absolutely, Correct quantifier usage
apply
they
will be Correct pronoun usage
it
a
best time for them. Change the article
the
For example
, when you have a look around this
town you can imagine all neighbours left
together Verb problem
living
is
in Unnecessary verb
apply
same
place without Change the article
the same
private
system.
Another point to considerCorrect article usage
a private
, nowadays
all variety Add a missing verb
is, nowadays
Change preposition
of circumstance
circumstance
Fix the agreement mistake
circumstances
is
obstacles and Correct subject-verb agreement
are
the
life is a change faster. It is Correct article usage
apply
also
possible to say that some traditional and behave
Verb problem
behaviours
is
not useful Correct subject-verb agreement
are
for
these days, and the new generation has a different thinking. Change preposition
apply
Moreover
, the youth not only have adverse thinking but also
there
opportunities Correct your spelling
their
is
changed because Change the verb form
are
jobs
and schools, all these have been making Change preposition
of jobs
an
you teenagers. Remove the article
apply
For instance
the
Correct article usage
apply
live
in cities Replace the word
living
are
different Correct subject-verb agreement
is
of
Change preposition
from
hometown
. We can enhance the thinking by Correct pronoun usage
my hometown
teach
our children some magnificent Change the verb form
teaching
moral
to tell them about grandparents‘ Fix the agreement mistake
morals
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
by
stories to create
a track mood for them.
In conclusion, despite people having different views, I believe that Change preposition
through
older
generation is the best time in the world and they gave us lessons Correct article usage
the older
how
can we deal with difficult situationsChange preposition
on how
Submitted by M on
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structure
The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion, which are necessary for a fully developed argument. An introduction should clearly state your thesis, while the conclusion should summarize your main points and restate your opinion.
coherence
The logical structure within paragraphs is weak, resulting in a lack of clear progression of ideas. Focus on organizing your paragraphs with a clear topic sentence followed by supporting sentences that develop the main idea.
development
Main points need better support through specific examples or explanations to strengthen the argument. Relying on generalizations weakens the essay's persuasive power.
task response
The response is incomplete and fails to fully address the task. Make sure to answer all parts of the question and develop your ideas fully to meet the task requirements.
clarity
There are some clear and comprehensive ideas present, but they need to be developed further and linked more effectively to create a cohesive argument.
examples
Use relevant and specific examples to illustrate your points. This adds credibility to your argument and demonstrates a better understanding of the topic.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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