Some people think that children should follow their parents’ advice, however, others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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While
some people believe that offspring should follow their
parent
's
advice
, others argue that they have to be independent. I support the former view which I will explain in
this
essay.
To begin
with, the people who advocate for
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
indpendency
Correct your spelling
independence
independency
argue that it would help them to
develope decion making
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develop decision-making
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
. By allowing them to
take
Correct your spelling
make
show examples
independent
decisons
Correct your spelling
decisions
, they will become successful in their future life.
In other words
, the
indipendent
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independent
children
are more efficient than the
offsprings
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offspring
show examples
who have
following
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followed their
show examples
parent's
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parents'
show examples
advice
. For
exmaple
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example
, a recent study in Germany indicated that
the
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apply
show examples
students without
guidence
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guidance
from
adult
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adults
show examples
have developed more skills
comparing
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compared
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to
the
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apply
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juvenile
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juveniles
show examples
with
guidence
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guidance
from
adult
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adults
show examples
.
However
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However,
show examples
the
kids
will not have
life
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the life
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experience to
take
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make
show examples
complex
decision
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decisions
show examples
in
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at
show examples
the
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apply
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crucial
time
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times
show examples
.
On the other hand
,
juvenile
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juveniles
show examples
would not be mature
to
Rephrase
enough to
show examples
take
Correct your spelling
make
show examples
complex
decision
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decisions
show examples
in their life
with
Change preposition
without
show examples
out
parent's
Fix the agreement mistake
parents'
show examples
advice
.
Parents
are accessible for their
kids
to guide and provide
advice
from their
broder
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broader
prospective
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perspective
show examples
and experience. In short,
parents
are responsible
to guide
Change preposition
for guiding
show examples
their
offsprings
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offspring
show examples
will be beneficial for them. For
exmple
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example
, It is
belived
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believed
that
Correct article usage
the offsprings
show examples
offsprings
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offspring
show examples
of single
parents
are suffering
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suffer
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depression and
psycological
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psychological
issues
comparing
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compared
show examples
to
the
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apply
show examples
juvenile
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juveniles
show examples
living with both
parents
.
Furthermore
,
kids
Verb problem
apply
show examples
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
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rely
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relay
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rely
show examples
on
parents
for their
finanicial
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financial
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needs
show examples
need
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needs
show examples
including school expenses and buying personal things,
therefore
,
parents
have the right to
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advise
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advice
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advise
show examples
their
kids
. In conclusion, I believe that
parent
's
advice
will be helpful for
children
for personality
developement
Correct your spelling
development
.
Although
decision making
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decision-making
show examples
skill is an advantage of independent
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
children's
,
parents
Change noun form
parents'
parent's
show examples
experience and guidance will be vital for
children
's development.
Submitted by ck.manshad on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion should be clear and directly address the question. It is crucial that your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points made within the body of the essay without introducing entirely new information.
coherence cohesion
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task achievement
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task achievement
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task achievement
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