Creative artists should always be given the freedom to express their own ideas in whichever way they wish. There should be not government restriction on what they do. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

#artists #freedom #government #restriction

Throughout human dramatic history,

artists

have had a substantial and senior role to play in the construction of individuals' outlooks about principal issues in societies.

This

impression has become more influential in

this

contemporary era when people have been surrounded by publicity stunts and media hype. The logic behind my mind is that

artists

' activities must have been confined by some common sense and sensible regulations. In

this

essay,

this

notion will be extended and demonstrated. To embark on, some of these

artists

have not had an appropriate education in a tremendous variety of realms which, they have a burning desire to participate and contribute. To put it in another way, when an unconsult person articulates misinformation which,

associated

Add a missing verb

is associated

show examples

with a vital phenomenon, it can give rise to a misinterpretation among

comminutes

Fix the agreement mistake

comminute

show examples

articles and instil a deleterious outcome in people's

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

Consequently

artists

who have not had relevant studies ought to be curbed from interference in crucial scopes.

Not to mention

, when an artist has been laid in the limelight of mass, unfortunately, they lose the normal cycle of their life and they have to do some extraordinary activities which,

backing

Wrong verb form

back

show examples

them up to be in the public eyes.

In other words

, adolescents and youngsters who, strongly have been influenced by popular persons (who do not possess the distinguishability between acceptable and unpleasant deeds) might emulate these anomalous actions and may be confronted with detrimental effects. In conclusion, to crumble these kinds of unintentional consequences and preserve our youth from them, governments must cease the artist's activities and elaborately

surveilance

Correct your spelling

surveillance

their accomplishments. All aforementioned standpoints

derive

Verb problem

lead

show examples

me to

concrete

Verb problem

apply

show examples

infer that, entertainers must be halted from doing anything that, they wish and governments must surveillance their accomplishments. To my ways of thinking the prevalent and privileged actors should be in the service of flourishing their people with well-established and programmed approaches.

Submitted by nimalizadeh.ir on Thu Jan 04 2024

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coherence cohesion

The essay presents a recognizable structure with an introduction and conclusion, but transitions between ideas can be improved for better logical flow.

coherence cohesion

Main ideas are present but sometimes lack development; work on fully expanding and supporting each point.

task achievement

The response addresses the topic, but the position taken could be clearer and arguments more fully developed. Consider including more precise examples to underpin your arguments.

task achievement

Increase clarity by directly responding to the question and sustaining a consistent position throughout the essay. Avoid redundant and repetitive expressions.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

311 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Creative artists should always be given the freedom to express their own ideas in whichever way they wish. There should be not government restriction on what they do. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people prefer to exercise in a fitness center, while others prefer outdoor activities. Choose one of them and give reasons and examples to support your opinion.

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people like to work in teams. Others prefer to work alone. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Culture is turning similar around the world. What are reasons? What are the positive and negative aspects?

In some countries girls and boys are educated in different schools rather than in the same school. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this ? Conclude with your opinion.