The map shows the public library 20 years ago and now. Compare and summarise the information in about 150 words.

#library #years #summarise #information

The map illustrates how the central public gallery was 20 years

back

Rephrase

ago

show examples

and how it is now.

Overall

, the current gallery is more developed than the previous one and almost all buildings were reconstructed into something else.

Initially

, it is seen clearly that the place for children's

books

and Equity desk area that was used for serving

ticket

Fix the agreement mistake

tickets

show examples

and receiving returned

books

was demolished and constructed into

lecture

Correct article usage

a lecture

show examples

room and cafe respectively.

However

Correct article usage

the

show examples

adult fiction notebook place was left in place

in addition

information

Add an article

the information

show examples

desk and three

self service

Add a hyphen

self-service

show examples

machines. In the

center

Change the spelling

centre

show examples

of the library, the chairs and tables have been placed there for people to on, just immediately after entering.

Furthermore

, it is observed that in the northwest, the map showed CDs, computer games and videos 20 years ago which were later

recotructed

Correct your spelling

reconstructed

into children's fiction

books

as well as

an area for storytelling

together with

sofas.

Moreover

today all reference

books

shelf was renovated after

adult

Correct article usage

the adult

show examples

fiction book section.

Lastly

, the room that was built

twinity

Correct your spelling

twenty

years ago for reading newspapers and magazines, is now being used as

computer

Add an article

a computer

the computer

show examples

room.

Submitted by jmeeme5 on Thu Jan 04 2024

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Vocabulary: Replace the words books with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "map" was used 2 times.

▼

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

184 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

evolve
renovation
infrastructure
amenities
state-of-the-art
landscape
pedestrian
augment
spatial
demolish
construct
accessibility
innovations
extensions
facade
environmental-friendly
urban development
public facility
modernize
technology integration

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