Some people decide to start their own business instead of working for a company or organization. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?
These days, the popularity of being an entrepreneur surpasses the prestige of working for another institution. Personally, I believe that the merits of owning a business outweigh its setbacks.
Although
establishing an enterprise seems to be more vulnerable in times of crisis, its freedom and social impact will serve as a strong reason why people should be encouraged to be businessmen.
To commence with, it is undeniable that shop owners are at risk during hard times. One clear example is the loss which most of the trade owners had to endure during the COVID-19 outbreak, with some enterprises even going bankrupt. When a profit-oriented company suffers from financial loss or even being closed permanently, the main source of income for its founders will be lost. Linking Words
Thus
, having to bear the risk of losing ownership of his/her field is one of the main disadvantages of being an entrepreneur.
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On the other hand
, running his/her own corporation will give an individual the freedom to decide on working time and job descriptions. Linking Words
For instance
, a lot of small companies are owned by women because they need to fulfil their responsibilities as mothers and business owners, necessitating the flexibility to manage the time they need to spend at work. Unlike a formal job which requires physical attendance from nine to five every day, running their own field is beneficial for people who need to do other things simultaneously. Linking Words
Therefore
, the flexibility in earning profit by selling own products or services has proven to be the most attractive feature of entrepreneurship.
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To conclude
, it is believed that a lot of people choose to start their own money-generating activities rather than serving an already established enterprise. I support Linking Words
this
trend because of its advantages, one of which is the independence obtained from running own employment, which outweighs the drawbacks Linking Words
such
as high vulnerability during a crisis.Linking Words
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay follows a clear and logical structure throughout. Your paragraphs should flow in a way that each idea naturally leads to the next, ensuring your argument builds progressively. Use a range of cohesive devices to make your essay more coherent.
coherence cohesion
While your introduction and conclusion were present, work on making them more impactful. The introduction should clearly outline the main points that will be discussed, and the conclusion should effectively summarize and provide a definitive stance on the issue without introducing new information.
coherence cohesion
Make sure your main points are fully developed and support your argument. You should include multiple aspects of the topic to showcase depth in your understanding and use examples that directly reinforce your main points.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the prompt, but you should strive for a more complete and detailed exploration of the topic. Make sure to fully address each part of the task and provide a balanced view, if applicable.
task achievement
Aim for clarity with comprehensive ideas that clearly relate to the topic. The essay would benefit from deeper analysis and explanation of how the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Provide clear reasons for your arguments.
task achievement
Your essay would improve with the inclusion of more relevant, specific examples to support your arguments. The examples used should clearly illustrate the points being made and be directly tied to the central argument of the essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.