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Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below gives information about Southland's main exports in 2000*20.., and future projections for 2025. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, anamake comparisons where relevant.

The chart below gives information about Southland's main exports in 2000*20.., and future projections for 2025. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, anamake comparisons where relevant.
#information #southland #exports #future #projections #summarise #features #anamake #comparisons
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The given bar chart illustrates the data about the three primary exports of Southland which were international tourism, dairy
products
Use synonyms
 and meat
products
Use synonyms
 respectively. It is given in a period of
years
Use synonyms
 2000 and 2020, and the prediction for the future period is 2025.
Overall
Linking Words
 it can be seen that all those three exports witnessed a significant drop throughout the period of three
years
Use synonyms
. It is
also
Linking Words
 worth noting that
while
Linking Words
 international tourism claimed a centre of popularity throughout these
years
Use synonyms
, meat
products
Use synonyms
 recorded a dramatic decrease. Taking a
further
Linking Words
 look into
Use synonyms
years
Correct article usage
the years
show examples
 2000 and 2020. It is obvious that in 2000, dairy
products
Use synonyms
 only accounted for nearly 7
billion
Use synonyms
pounds
Use synonyms
,
whereas
Linking Words
 in the
year
Use synonyms
2020
Add a comma
2020,
show examples
this
Linking Words
 amount moderately increased from 7
billion
Use synonyms
pounds
Use synonyms
 to around 10
billion
Use synonyms
pounds
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 shift in dairy
products
Use synonyms
 between these two
years
Use synonyms
 was claimed to have the highest increasing proportion.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, in the
year
Use synonyms
 2025, the projection was predicted to be at the average amount compared to the other two previous
years
Use synonyms
 with the amount of approximately 9.5
billion
Use synonyms
pounds
Use synonyms
. Looking at the remaining exports in detail. Whilst international tourism recorded a slight rise in each given
year
Use synonyms
 by an optimal value of 1
billion
Use synonyms
pounds
Use synonyms
, meat
products
Use synonyms
 stood at the lowest position and evident an infinitesimal decline. Noticeably, the shift in each
year
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 obtained an equitable value of around 500 million
pounds
Use synonyms
 .
Submitted by thinhatvypham127 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words products, years, billion, pounds, year with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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