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Many things that used to be done in the house by hand, are now being done by machines, Does this development brings more advantages or disadvantages?

#house #hand #machines #development
It is widely acknowledged that house
chores
, which used to be done by manual labour, are now gradually replaced by
technology
. There is a probability of decreasing the physical activity level on a daily basis, which is the potential drawback derived from the phenomenon.
However
, I believe that
this
 innovation brings more
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
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 in relation to
time
 efficiency. Reduced physical activity resulting from the simplicity of home appliances is the primary negative outcome
that is
 likely to happen. Allowing
technology
 to take over basic
chores
 will provide you with more leisure
time
 during the day.
That is
 to say, leisure
time
 is prone to being the exclusive factor for someone to
adapt
Correct your spelling
adopt
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 a sedentary lifestyle.
According to
 the
journal
Capitalize word
Journal
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 of
human behaviour
Correct your spelling
Human Behaviour
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, young
people
 who decide to buy a vacuum cleaner tend to develop a mindset of procrastination, which
further
 leads to their laziness
to do
Change preposition
in doing
show examples
 basic things.
Thus
, it will
further
 cause more severe health problems to happen. A perfectly curated
technology
 that results in less error plays a big role in regard to
time
 efficiency. The dishwasher, which is meticulously formulated to wash dishes in 5 minutes, provides a similar quality result as manual work which can take up to approximately 20 minutes.
In addition
, it
also
 possesses a low risk of having a broken plate
due to
 the nonchalant aspect.
Hence
, the allocations of
time
 remaining worth 15 minutes that
people
possess
Verb problem
apply
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can
be used
Wrong verb form
use
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 to finish other works they find interesting. Allowing
people
 to do something they would enjoy by doing it has proven to play a crucial role in reducing stress
level
Fix the agreement mistake
levels
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.
According to
 the interview with family experts,
people
 who permit themselves to use
technology
 to assist them with home
chores
 have proven to acquire fewer emotional burdens
due to
 their ability to spend more quality
time
 with themselves.
To conclude
, adapting machines to do basic
chores
 has both negative and positive outcomes,
such
 as reduced physical activity and increased
time
 efficiency.
However
, I believe that the advantage of
this
 current innovation outweighs the
drawback
Fix the agreement mistake
drawbacks
show examples
.
Submitted by chastinervine on

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task achievement
Make sure to have a clear thesis statement in the introduction that outlines the main points to be discussed. The concluding paragraph should also summarize the main arguments discussed and restate the writer's position clearly.
coherence cohesion
Organize your ideas clearly and logically. Use cohesive devices appropriately to ensure a smooth flow of information from one paragraph to the next. Employ a variety of sentence structures for coherence and to keep the reader engaged.
task achievement
Provide specific, relevant examples to support your arguments. Broad statements could be more persuasive if backed by concrete evidence or studies, helping to strengthen the argument and make it more compelling.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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