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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

the graph below shows unemployment levels in Ireland and the number of people leaving the country between 1988 and 2008. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main feature of the graph and make comparisons where relevant

the graph below shows unemployment levels in Ireland and the number of people leaving the country between 1988 and 2008. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main feature of the graph and make comparisons where relevant
#unemployment #levels #ireland #people #country #information #feature #comparisons
This
 line graph illustrates
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of people leaving Ireland and the
unemployment
 rate
during
Change preposition
for
show examples
 20 years from 1988 to 2008. In general , it is obvious from the graph that the level of
unemployment
 and people leaving Ireland were the highest trends in 1988.
According to
 what was
showed
Wrong verb form
shown
show examples
, the level of
unemployment
 rapidly dropped from 17% to 13% from 1988 to 1990.
On the other hand
 , it suddenly decreased to 15% during
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
 two years ( 1990 to 1992). After that , the percentage of
unemployment
 was slowly falling from 1992 to 2000 about 9 %.After falling, the level of
unemployment
had
Verb problem
was
show examples
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
levelled
Correct your spelling
level
show examples
during
Change preposition
for
show examples
 four years from 2000 to 2004 about 4%.
Then
 , it was slowly growing to 6% from 2004 to 2008. Looking at the line graph for more details , the number of people leaving the country was the most popular
trending
Replace the word
trend
show examples
 from 1990 to 19920 about 25000 .
However
, the number of them suddenly rose from 25000 to 50000 during 2004 to 2008.
Submitted by m on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words unemployment with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "fall" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slowly" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • unemployment levels
  • emigration rates
  • economic conditions
  • correlation
  • inverse relationship
  • significant changes
  • peaks and troughs
  • steady state
  • trend analysis
  • government policies
  • global events
  • data interpretation
  • comparative analysis
  • key findings
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