Nowadays, a lot of people use credit cards for online shopping. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Credit
cards
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
paying
mechanism
Fix the agreement mistake
mechanisms
show examples
that
currently
Add a missing verb
are currently
show examples
used by many individuals for online shopping. In
this
essay,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
will explain why the benefits of using
credit
cards
overshadow the potential drawbacks. In terms of
credit
cards
as tools for paying
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
online shopping, some
threat
Fix the agreement mistake
threats
show examples
may
occured
Correct your spelling
occur
occurred
.
Firstly
, when paying in
online
Correct article usage
an online
show examples
store, the owner should input several
information
Correct quantifier usage
pieces of information
show examples
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
the website, which are name,
credit
card
number, and CVV number. All of
those information
Change the determiner
that information
show examples
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
vurnerable
Correct your spelling
vulnerable
to
be
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
scammed by online
scammer
Correct your spelling
scamers
and
Correct word choice
who
show examples
used
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
the number for their own benefit.
Secondly
, as a buyer, using
credit
card
Fix the agreement mistake
cards
show examples
may lead to impulsive buying. Because, from
Correct article usage
a phsycological
show examples
phsycological
Correct your spelling
psychological
physiological
perspective, the buyer can pay it
after
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a month later without
interrupt
Change the verb form
interrupting
show examples
their current
cashflow
Correct your spelling
cash flow
show examples
. To illustrate, it is common happened that several e-commerce are hacked and the
customer
data
is sell
Change the verb form
is sold
show examples
in the
darkweb
Correct your spelling
dark web
,
as a consequence
the
customer
Change noun form
customer's
show examples
credit
card
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
on
Change preposition
at
show examples
risk
to get
Change preposition
of getting
show examples
scammed. Regarding the benefit of using
credit
cards
,
this
payment method
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
helpful and convenient.
Fistly
Correct your spelling
Firstly
,
customer
Add an article
the customer
a customer
show examples
could get
instalment
Correct article usage
an instalment
show examples
facility from
credit
Add an article
a credit
the credit
show examples
card
with zero interest,
therefore
they can pay the bill every month with
lower
Add an article
a lower
the lower
show examples
amount and not disturb their
cashflow
Correct your spelling
cash flow
show examples
.
Secondly
, the security of
credit
card
Fix the agreement mistake
cards
show examples
is better compared with debit
card
Fix the agreement mistake
cards
show examples
and can
access
Wrong verb form
be accessed
show examples
from mobile banking to easily check
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
any suspicious transaction.
Moreover
,
credit
card
Fix the agreement mistake
cards
show examples
always
Add a missing verb
are always
show examples
followed with miles
gift
Fix the agreement mistake
gifts
show examples
that
customer
Fix the agreement mistake
customers
show examples
can redeem
everytime
Replace the word
every time
show examples
,
this
main facility
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
the most interesting for
customer
Fix the agreement mistake
customers
show examples
.
For instance
, if any
scammed is
Wrong verb form
scams
show examples
happen,
customer
Fix the agreement mistake
customers
show examples
can easily block and call the bank to cancel the transaction.
Thus
,
Add an article
the customer
show examples
customer
Fix the agreement mistake
customers
show examples
will not billed
in
Change the preposition
at
show examples
the end of
month
Add an article
the month
show examples
. In conclusion,
credit
card
Fix the agreement mistake
cards
show examples
may risky of scammed,
however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
this
method is easy to use and
offer
Correct subject-verb agreement
offers
show examples
several benefits for
customer
Fix the agreement mistake
customers
show examples
.
Therefore
, on balance,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
remain firmly convinced that the demerits are eclipsed by the demerits.
Submitted by 2024successielts on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence and Cohesion
You should ensure that your essay has a clear and coherent structure, including a distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The introduction should outline your main points and your conclusion should summarize the essay effectively without introducing new ideas.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your body paragraphs should each focus on a single main idea. Use topic sentences to indicate the point of each paragraph clearly, and ensure that each idea is fully developed and supported with concrete examples or explanations.
Language
Check for typos, grammatical errors, and appropriately varied vocabulary. These elements are crucial for clarity of expression and the overall impression of your written English.
Task Response
Respond to all parts of the task. Ensure that you have explained both the advantages and disadvantages thoroughly and provided a clear opinion on whether one outweighs the other. Your conclusion should reflect a well-reasoned position based on the content of your essay.
Task Response
Make sure your examples are specifically relevant to the points you are making. Examples help to illustrate your points and provide a clear understanding of your arguments.
Language
Work on your sentence structure and punctuation to enhance readability. Complex sentences should be used correctly and should contribute to the clear presentation of ideas.
Language
Mind the spelling of words and use of articles. Phrases such as 'phsycological' should be corrected to 'psychological', and 'demerits are eclipsed by the demerits' is contradictory and unclear; consider rephrasing for clarity.
Language
Pay attention to word forms and consistency in verb tenses. Errors such as 'used the number' instead of 'use the number' or inconsistencies in verb forms can impact the essay's clarity.
Tone
Be sure to remain objective and balanced in your argumentation. Phrases like 'i remain firmly convinced' can come across as overly subjective without a proper explanation of why one side outweighs the other. Maintain a formal and academic tone throughout your essay.
Language
Be mindful of singular and plural noun agreement within your sentences. Errors such as 'this method are easy to use' should be 'this method is easy to use'

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: