▪️You work for a company where the manager is soon going to retire. Write a letter to the assistant manager. In your letter: ▪️ Propose how the retirement party for the manager can be organised. ▪️Explain how the manager has influenced you at work. ▪️Suggest a suitable retirement gift for the manager. Write at least 150 words.

#▪️you #work #company #manager #assistant #retirement #party #▪️explain #▪️suggest #gift

Dear Mrs. Homa With pleasure, I was informed that

Mrs.

Change the punctuation

Mrs

show examples

Hoseini will be

retired

Wrong verb form

retiring

show examples

in the

Correct word choice

near

show examples

future. She was a kind of mentor to me and

help

Wrong verb form

helped

show examples

me in developing and coping with my responsibilities from the very first day of my job. She taught me to face my work challenges and without panicking just try to find solutions. Her strength and patience during the time that I work for her always influence me in my working and personal life. With respect, I would be happy if you let me plan some details for her goodbye

party

.I am a good cook and I could make some snacks and sandwiches for the

party

besides

that if it is ok I can ask my husband to play some music at the

party

Also

, I was thinking of a surprise gift for her, something which reminds her

our

Change preposition

of our

show examples

respects

Fix the agreement mistake

respect

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and sentiment. I know a very special gold gallery and they design customer’s name on gold and we could order a necklace with her name written on

onside

Correct your spelling

one side

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and the company’s name on the other side. By wearing it she could remember all her working memories and the time which she had with us. I know, you and other colleagues may have your own ideas and suggestions, So I would appreciate

Correct pronoun usage

it if

show examples

you just let me to contribute

Change preposition

apply

show examples

conducting her goodbye

party

. Best regards

Submitted by zohal21 on Sun Jan 07 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure the letter has a clear paragraph structure with separate paragraphs for each point proposed.

coherence cohesion

Use transitional words and phrases to guide the reader smoothly from one idea to the next.

coherence cohesion

Each paragraph should focus on a single point as requested in the task. Avoid mixing different ideas in the same paragraph.

task achievement

Fully develop each point required by the task to provide a complete response.

task achievement

Maintain a consistent and appropriate tone throughout the letter suitable for the audience and purpose.

Structure your letter

A letter needs to be written using a proper format, including the following:

A greeting (Dear sir/madam, Dear John, Dear Mr. Smith)
The main body (consisting of paragraphs for each part of the letter)
A closing (Yours sincerely, Yours faithfully, Best wishes, Kind regards, Love)

When writing a letter as part of the IELTS General Training Writing Task 1, it is important to include the bullet points presented to you in the question.

All three bullet points need to be presented. And remember that some bullet points contain more than one element. So, make sure to watch for ‘and’ and plurals.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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2Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

232 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Structure your letter

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones.Why is this case?Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

The increase in the production of consumer goods results in damage to the natural environment. What are the causes of this? What can be done to solve this problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Lack of fresh water is becoming a global issue of increasing importance. What problems does this shortage cause? What measures could be taken to overcome these problems?

All students ought to study art and music in school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying medicines and treatments by themselves instead of visiting their usual doctors. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?