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Band 4.5

The charts below show the number of Japanese tourists travelling abroad between 1985 and 1995 and Australia’s share of the Japanese tourist market. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.

The charts below show the number of Japanese tourists travelling abroad between 1985 and 1995 and Australia’s share of the Japanese tourist market. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.
#show #japanese #tourists #australia’s #tourist #market #report #university #lecturer #information
The charts below introduce us
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
 numbers of
tourist
Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
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 travelling abroad during the years 1985 to 1995 and the
Australians
Change noun form
Australian's
Australians'
show examples
 share of the
Japanese
tourist
 market. In the first
chart
Add a comma
chart,
show examples
 we can see that the
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
 of
Japanese
tourist
Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
show examples
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
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abroud
Correct your spelling
abroad
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 been increasing since 1985, in the second chart we can see how the percentage of
Japanese
 visiting Australia has
also
increase
Change the verb form
increased
show examples
 in the
las
Correct your spelling
last
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years
Correct quantifier usage
few years
show examples
.
Lookin
Correct your spelling
Looking
show examples
 in more
details
Fix the agreement mistake
detail
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
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one
Correct article usage
the one
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 hand we can see that the number of
Japanese
tourist
Change to a plural noun
tourists
show examples
 is now in 1985, 4 times bigger than in 1885.
In
addition
Add a comma
addition,
show examples
 the
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
 of tourists
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 only gone down in 1991 to continue the growing the next year.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
 the
oder
Correct your spelling
other
 hand for the percentage visiting
Australia
Add a comma
Australia,
show examples
 we have almost the same variation,
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
the percentage always increasing and going in 1990 down to start increasing again the next year. In
conclusion
Add a comma
conclusion,
show examples
 we can see that the 2 charts have the same variation in almost the same years, so we can say they are related one to
other
Correct quantifier usage
another
show examples
.
Submitted by santos_dij on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words tourist, japanese with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "numbers of" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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