IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

#person’s #status #possessions #values #honour #kindness #trust
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In recent times, it is believed that moral characteristics
such
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 as honour,kindness and
trust
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became
Wrong verb form
have become
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 less essential.Since
,
Remove the comma
apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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people
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 are
judging
Wrong verb form
judged
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 based on their
status
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 and physical appearance.I completely agree with the latter notion ,but
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 do not think that moral values
have
Verb problem
are
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 less important The primary reason is that nowadays in society humans are basically giving their opinions, by seeing the
status
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 of the person.If
person
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a person
the person
show examples
 has more wealth and if they are involved in any crime
also
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 they will not punish them rather they will support them.
For Instance
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,mostly we see celebrities commit crimes for which they will not get punished because of their
status
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 and the publicity they have.
Furthermore
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 ,
people
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 will treated differently when using public transport.If the person is wealthy they will be prioritised and treated with the utmost respect.
In contrast
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,lower-class
people
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 will left alone and neglected if they pay the same price.To illustrate,in many cultures lower income
people
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 are not welcome. I completely disagree that kindness and
trust
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 have less importance in society.
Moreover
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, characteristics play a crucial role in human life.
Additionally
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,there are humans who sacrifice their lives for honesty. In fact, in the modern world ,these characteristics of
people
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 are more welcome in the organization.
For example
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,there are many organizations that believe in honesty and
trust
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 the successful achievements and in the same way they give rewards to their employees because of their kindness and
trust
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 in their successful achievements. In conclusion, Most
of
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apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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people
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 will judge others
according to
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 their
status
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 and physical appearance rather than on their honesty and
trust
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.
Submitted by rani.reddy2003 on

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coherence cohesion
Make sure to structure your essay with a clear introduction stating your opinion clearly, followed by body paragraphs that each contain one main idea supported by specific examples or explanations. Ensure the conclusion restates your opinion succinctly.
task achievement
You need to focus on clearly presenting your main ideas and providing concrete, relevant examples to support them. Your essay should address the prompt directly throughout, avoiding generalizations and focusing on the specific aspect of the discussion.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Social status
  • Material possessions
  • Old-fashioned values
  • Honour
  • Kindness
  • Trust
  • Judged
  • Importance
  • Traditional
  • Reflection
  • Achievements
  • Hard work
  • Disregarded
  • Well-balanced
  • Meaningful
  • Cultural norms
  • Societal norms
What to do next:
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