IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

#person’s #status #possessions #values #honour #kindness #trust
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In recent times, it is believed that moral characteristics
such
 as honour,kindness and
trust
became
Wrong verb form
have become
show examples
 less essential.Since
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
 are
judging
Wrong verb form
judged
show examples
 based on their
status
 and physical appearance.I completely agree with the latter notion ,but
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 do not think that moral values
have
Verb problem
are
show examples
 less important The primary reason is that nowadays in society humans are basically giving their opinions, by seeing the
status
 of the person.If
person
Add an article
a person
the person
show examples
 has more wealth and if they are involved in any crime
also
 they will not punish them rather they will support them.
For Instance
,mostly we see celebrities commit crimes for which they will not get punished because of their
status
 and the publicity they have.
Furthermore
 ,
people
 will treated differently when using public transport.If the person is wealthy they will be prioritised and treated with the utmost respect.
In contrast
,lower-class
people
 will left alone and neglected if they pay the same price.To illustrate,in many cultures lower income
people
 are not welcome. I completely disagree that kindness and
trust
 have less importance in society.
Moreover
, characteristics play a crucial role in human life.
Additionally
,there are humans who sacrifice their lives for honesty. In fact, in the modern world ,these characteristics of
people
 are more welcome in the organization.
For example
,there are many organizations that believe in honesty and
trust
 the successful achievements and in the same way they give rewards to their employees because of their kindness and
trust
 in their successful achievements. In conclusion, Most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
 will judge others
according to
 their
status
 and physical appearance rather than on their honesty and
trust
.
Submitted by rani.reddy2003 on

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coherence cohesion
Make sure to structure your essay with a clear introduction stating your opinion clearly, followed by body paragraphs that each contain one main idea supported by specific examples or explanations. Ensure the conclusion restates your opinion succinctly.
task achievement
You need to focus on clearly presenting your main ideas and providing concrete, relevant examples to support them. Your essay should address the prompt directly throughout, avoiding generalizations and focusing on the specific aspect of the discussion.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Social status
  • Material possessions
  • Old-fashioned values
  • Honour
  • Kindness
  • Trust
  • Judged
  • Importance
  • Traditional
  • Reflection
  • Achievements
  • Hard work
  • Disregarded
  • Well-balanced
  • Meaningful
  • Cultural norms
  • Societal norms
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