IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The line chart below shows the public transport usage in four major cities around the world from 1980 to 2019. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The line chart below shows the public transport usage in four major cities around the world from 1980 to 2019. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#line #transport #usage #four #cities #world #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The line chart given illustrates the common
transpotasion
Correct your spelling
transportation
 which has
usaged
Correct your spelling
usage
 in Tokyo, New York, London,
Correct word choice
and Sdyney
show examples
Sdyney
Correct your spelling
Sydney
 from 1980 to 2019.
Overall
, Tokyo
is
Verb problem
has
show examples
 the highest usage
transport
Change preposition
of transport
show examples
 compared to other cities. In 1980, people who
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
 using
publict
Correct your spelling
public
tranportasion
Correct your spelling
transportation
about 11
points
.
Then
 in
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
1985, it
was has
Change the verb form
had
show examples
increase
Change the verb form
increased
show examples
 by one point
slighty
Correct your spelling
slightly
 11. After 5 years, it rose exactly 20
points
.
While
 in 1995, it
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased
around
Change preposition
to around
show examples
 23.
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
 in 2000, it
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
declined
experinces
Correct your spelling
experiences
experience
 slightly about 21.
Futhermore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, it
has grown
Wrong verb form
grew
show examples
 in 2005
about
Change preposition
to about
show examples
 35,
subsequently
, it
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased in 2010
Change preposition
to
show examples
approximately 45.
Then
 it
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
experienced growth
exactly
Change preposition
of exactly
show examples
 50
in
Change the preposition
at
show examples
 the
end
 of
period
Add an article
the period
show examples
.
On the other hand
, London has significantly
rose
Wrong verb form
risen in
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 number of usage public transport
started
Wrong verb form
starting at
show examples
 about 15
points
 in 1980. There it
is increasing
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 significantly until the
end
 of
period
Add an article
the period
show examples
.
Futhermore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, New York
city
Capitalize word
City
show examples
is
Verb problem
had
show examples
 the
thrid
Correct your spelling
third
show examples
 number of
higher
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
commuters transportation in the world around 20
points
 in 1980.
Whereas
, it has increased during the 20 years ( about 25, 30, 39, and 41).
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
 in 2005, it
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
decreased
about
Change preposition
by about
show examples
 40
points
. In 2010 it
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
experienced
Correct article usage
an
show examples
increase until the
end
 of
period
Add an article
the period
a period
show examples
 in 2019
approximately
Change preposition
by approximately
show examples
 50
points
.
Moreover
, Tokyo
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
started almost
quarter
Correct article usage
a quarter
show examples
 of 30
points
 in 1980.
In addition
,it has been rose significantly in 1958,1990,1995,2000,2005,2010 ( exactly 30,40,50,55,60,70, and 75) until the
end
 of
period
 2019 about 79
points
.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words points, end, period with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 7 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 3 times.
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