IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show the reasons why people travel to work by bicycle or by car. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the reasons why people travel to work by bicycle or by car. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#show #people #travel #work #bicycle #car #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The pie chart provides data about the
reasons
Use synonyms
 why individuals
travel
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 to
work
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 by bicycle or by car.
Overall
Linking Words
, the main
reasons
Use synonyms
 why humans
travel
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 to
work
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 by bicycle are less pollution and fitness,
whereas
Linking Words
 the main
reason
Use synonyms
 for driving to
work
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 is comfort. As can be seen, the main
reasons
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 for cycling to
work
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 are less pollution and fitness. Both have the same percentages which is 30 per
cent
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. The other
reason
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 for cycling to
work
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 is no parking problems. It has 15 per
cent
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 which is
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
half of less pollution and fitness. People
also
Linking Words
travel
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 to
work
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 by bicycle because of no costs and
and
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
faster driving. The percentages of no costs(13 per
cent
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) and
and
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apply
show examples
faster driving(12 per
cent
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 ) are pretty similar. The
least
Correct your spelling
last
show examples
reason
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 for cycling to
work
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 is faster driving. The main
reason
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 for driving to
work
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 is comfort with
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 percentage of 40 per
cent
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. After comfort comes distance to
work
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 which
has
Verb problem
is
show examples
 21 per
cent
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. The
reasons
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faster
Change preposition
for faster
show examples
 than cycling and 
need
Correct article usage
the need
show examples
 to carry things to
work
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 have the same proportions which is 14 per
cent
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. The
least
Correct your spelling
last
show examples
reason
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 why individuals
travel
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 to
work
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 by car compared to other
reasons
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 is safer than cycling. It has 11 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by tmargaryan2006 on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words reasons, travel, work, reason, cent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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