some people say that computer game are bad for children by all means; others believe that these games are contributing to children's development discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Some argue that video
games
are detrimental to the well-being of young people, Use synonyms
while
others contend that they Linking Words
also
possess positive attributes contributing to their education. After a comprehensive analysis, I ultimately assert that excessive Linking Words
screen
Use synonyms
time
can be harmful, yet dedicating a few hours to solving complex Use synonyms
games
may enhance a child's cognitive abilities.
On one hand, prolonged hours in front of a computer Use synonyms
screen
may adversely impact a person's health. Extended gaming sessions can lead to issues Use synonyms
such
as eye fatigue and headaches. Linking Words
Moreover
, considering the need for children to be more physically active than adults, excessive Linking Words
screen
Use synonyms
time
can impede their Use synonyms
overall
well-being. In essence, their bodies suffer from the extended duration spent playing.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, certain Linking Words
games
present formidable challenges and require critical decision-making. These complex activities can contribute to the mental development of our young ones. Engaging in Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
games
allows them to hone decision-making skills, preparing them for future life challenges.
In conclusion, Use synonyms
while
some argue that electronic Linking Words
games
pose health risks, others recognize Use synonyms
positive
aspects. I believe that the duration of Correct article usage
the positive
screen
Use synonyms
time
should be limited below a defined threshold. Use synonyms
However
, there are distinct advantages to investing Linking Words
time
in solving challenging problems presented through gaming. In Use synonyms
this
way, children can effortlessly acquire valuable skills.Linking Words
Submitted by giuliarighetti on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear and logical flow of ideas throughout your essay. Transition words are useful but should be chosen carefully to reflect the precise relationship between ideas.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are crucial for framing your essay. It is good practice to restate the topic and briefly summarize your viewpoint in the conclusion, which you have done reasonably well.
coherence cohesion
To bolster your main points, include more detailed examples or evidence. While you have provided some support for your arguments, richer detail would make them more persuasive.
task achievement
Address both views presented in the task fully, with a balanced discussion before providing your own opinion, as you did well in this essay. Ensuring to meet the task requirement enhances your score significantly.
task achievement
Your ideas are clearly communicated and comprehensive, which is positive. Continue to develop your ideas thoroughly to maintain a high level of clarity.
task achievement
Incorporate relevant examples to substantiate your points. You could benefit from more specific examples that directly relate to the arguments being made.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.