The chart below compares the percentage of time Australian mothers and fathers spent helping their children with four activities in 2013. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram shows the proportion of

time

Use synonyms

that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

parents in Australia spent assisting their

children

Use synonyms

with dressing, homework, playing

games

Use synonyms

and preparing for bed in the year 2013.

Overall

Linking Words

, the

mothers

Use synonyms

dedicated most

their

Change preposition

of their

show examples

time

Use synonyms

Change preposition

show examples

helping

children

Use synonyms

with dressing whilst the

fathers

Use synonyms

used more

time

Use synonyms

in helping

children

Use synonyms

with their

games

Use synonyms

To begin

Linking Words

with,

mothers

Use synonyms

are seen to be spending more of their

time

Use synonyms

Change preposition

apply

show examples

assisting their young stars with dressing.

Mothers

Use synonyms

spent about 75% in total doing

this

Linking Words

Mre

Correct your spelling

show examples

importantly,

fathers

Use synonyms

and

mothers

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

spent

majority

Add an article

the majority

show examples

of their

time

Use synonyms

which amounts to approximately 70%

Change preposition

apply

show examples

assisting their

children

Use synonyms

Change preposition

with

show examples

how

games

Use synonyms

are played.

Linking Words

Further more

Correct your spelling

Furthermore

show examples

, it can be seen that both

mothers

Use synonyms

and

fathers

Use synonyms

spent the same hours

Change preposition

apply

show examples

around 50% in both dressing and preparing

children

Use synonyms

Change preposition

for

show examples

bed. It is

also

Linking Words

crucial to point out that

fathers

Use synonyms

alone contributed the least in assisting

children

Use synonyms

. In assisting

children

Use synonyms

with dressing, homework, playing

games

Use synonyms

and bed

preperation

Correct your spelling

preparation

fathers

Use synonyms

spent around 1%,10%, 5% and 3% respectively.

tafadzwakguruza

Jan 10, 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words time, children, games, mothers, fathers with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

167 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

percentage
time spent
Australian mothers
fathers
helping
children
activities
reading
homework
playing sports
general play
comparison
2013
significantly
difference

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
- There is a kind of sexual discriminations at any company. What are the reasons to this? What kind of solutions can be mentioned?
Sexual discrimination remains a persistent and complex challenge in many workplaces. In this essay,I will explore some of the key reasons behind the continued prevalence of this issue and discuss potential solutions that employers can implement to address it.
8
band
Some parents think that their children should study in other countries because it has a number of benefits. Others think by studying in other countries, children will face a lot of problems. Discuss both views and give your opinion
The question of whether kids ought to study in another country has prompted a substantial debate among parents. While many contend against it, as they believe it will result in the loss of their cultural background, others advocate for this because it increases their job prospects, which, in my opinion, offers them the best chance in life. Analyzing these facts will give a comprehensive overview of the subject matter.
7.5
band
Studies suggest that many teenagers these days prefer socialising online to meeting one another in person. Why do you think this is the case? What measures could be taken to encourage teenagers to spend more time meeting one another in person? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In the current digitalization era, research concludes that young generations prefer to interact online rather than to meet physically. This phenomenon is understandable because everyone has phones, and most of them are active social media users. In my opinion, there are three reasons why this phenomenon is happening nowadays.
8
band
Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have a little effect on public health, and that other measures are required. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
A problem of modern societies is the declining level of heath in the general population, with conflicting views on how to tackle this worrying trend. One possible solution is to provide more sports facilities to encourage a more active lifestyle.
6
band
Some people believe that software programming should be taught at primary school. Others think that the focus at this level should be on playing. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion
Nowadays, computer engineering and software programming occupations are more popular and common in job markets. Therefore, it is frequently argued that students at primary school ought to study software programming, while other people believe that children must spend their time at primary school playing rather than focusing on hard academic topics. In my opinion, playing at primary school is more beneficial for children than studying subjects. This is due to the fact that difficult topics make children asocial persons.

The chart below compares the percentage of time Australian mothers and fathers spent helping their children with four activities in 2013. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

- There is a kind of sexual discriminations at any company. What are the reasons to this? What kind of solutions can be mentioned?

Some parents think that their children should study in other countries because it has a number of benefits. Others think by studying in other countries, children will face a lot of problems. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have a little effect on public health, and that other measures are required. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that software programming should be taught at primary school. Others think that the focus at this level should be on playing. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion