IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph below shows the average monthly change in the prices of three metals during 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The graph below shows the average monthly change in the prices of three metals during 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
#change #prices #three #metals #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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This
Linking Words
 line graph depicts monthly alteration regularity in three metals’ prices within 2014.
In
Change preposition
At
show examples
 a glance, the
prices
Fix the agreement mistake
price
show examples
 change percentages in copper and nickel decreased,
while
Linking Words
 a slight increase was identified
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the zinc category, over the period stated.
Further
Linking Words
, nickel was
notified
Replace the word
noticed
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 as the highest percentage
then
Linking Words
 became the lowest one
at the end
Linking Words
 of the period and
the
Correct article usage
apply
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copper experienced the same trend, whilst
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
zinc was the only metal
had
Correct pronoun usage
that had
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 an increase.
Initially
Linking Words
,
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 January, the nickel category stood at 6% and suddenly dropped to -3%
on
Change preposition
in
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 June. After which, it dramatically rose
at the end
Linking Words
 of the year by 4%.
Likewise
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,
on
Change preposition
in
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 January, beginning at 2% was recognised on copper. Following that, an even lower proportion amounted
in
Change preposition
to
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 -0.5 on the same metal after the next 5 months, prior to
surge
Correct article usage
a surge
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 to 1.5% on the final annual mentioned.
Conversely
Linking Words
, the zinc proportion right over the early period started at 1%,
following
Wrong verb form
followed
show examples
 by
2
Correct article usage
a 2
show examples
% gradual decline in the six gap months.
In addition
Linking Words
, it climbed significantly to 2% on the twelfth.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "at the end".
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • fluctuate
  • volatile
  • stability
  • peak
  • trough
  • increment
  • decrement
  • steady
  • gradual
  • sharp
  • increase
  • decrease
  • month-on-month
  • average monthly change
  • commodity
  • benchmark
  • trend
  • precipitous
  • plateau
  • significant
  • marginal
  • surge
  • dip
  • plummet
  • soar
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