Some people belive that robots are very important to human’s future development, whilw others believe they are dangerous and negatively affect society.
Robots
have been making our lives so much easier , Correct word choice
but hencesome
hencesome
people think they might not be good for our future or even hurt us in some ways. I strongly disagree with Correct your spelling
hence some
handsome
this
statement.
these days robotshave
many benefits for human lives Correct your spelling
robots have
for example
there are bots that help us heal our mental health , choose things that suit us the best ,learn new things with their help ,or even answer all our questions and do many of the tasks that before them they would take a lot of time and energy from us , for instance
,chat gpt is a bot that can solve many of your problems and you can ask any question that you want and in some way,it will give you the best answers and make you save more
time.
another thing that leads us to have these negative mindsets toward robots
is the effect of fictional movies, series , books etc ,that display robots
as villains or creatures who destroy humans take control of the world and start to do evil things for example
there is a series called west world which the story is exactly about how bad robotscan
be .Correct your spelling
robots can
while
us humans should be more thoughtful and see the
positive effects of these equipment
on our world.
Change the determiner
this equipment
to sum up
, except for some workers who have been replaced by robots
literally, we can only see benefits from this
technology that helps us every day to raise the quality of our lives.Submitted by behnazahmadi2004 on
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Introduction
The essay lacks a clear introduction that presents both sides of the argument. Consider starting with a sentence that introduces the topic and outlines the points to be discussed.
Thesis Statement
There's no clear thesis statement summarizing the writer's main argument or position on robots' impact on society. It is essential to include this in the introduction to guide the reader.
Logical Structure
Ideas about robots are presented in an unordered fashion and can be arranged more logically. The writer should focus on a clear progression of ideas from introduction through to conclusion.
Conclusion
The conclusion only briefly restates the writer's viewpoint without summing up the main points discussed in the essay. Aim to reinforce your argument clearly in the conclusion.
Supporting Examples
There is repetition and overgeneralization regarding the topic without substantial evidence or examples. The writer should include specific examples that support their points about robots.
Task Response
The essay does not completely address the counterargument about robots being dangerous. A balanced argument requires exploring opposing viewpoints more comprehensively.
Sentence Structure
Sentences should be structured to avoid run-on sentences and fragments. Paragraphs must have a clear topic sentence followed by supporting sentences and a concluding sentence.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.