IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

It is becoming increasingly popular to take a year off between finishing school and going to college. What are the advantages and disadvantages?

#year #school #college
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Now days we commonly observe people who not
going
Wrong verb form
go
show examples
 to University after they finish
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
high
school
Use synonyms
 ,they spend
one
Use synonyms
year
Use synonyms
 more before going to
Use synonyms
collage
Correct your spelling
college
show examples
 to relax after
they
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 Street
time
Use synonyms
 . In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
 I will put light on both advantages and
dis advantages
Correct your spelling
disadvantages
show examples
. On
Use synonyms
one
Correct article usage
the one
show examples
 hand, there are multifarious advantages of having a rest for
Use synonyms
year
Add an article
the year
a year
show examples
 to improve their skills in their life and how they deal with others .
Furthermore
Linking Words
 ,
Use synonyms
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of
students
Use synonyms
 in the
last
Linking Words
year
Use synonyms
 of
theire
Correct your spelling
their
 education in
school
Use synonyms
faced
Wrong verb form
face
show examples
Use synonyms
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of
difficults
Correct your spelling
difficult
difficulties
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
show examples
 and streets . By saying so ,I mean that the
students
Use synonyms
 stay in their
house
Fix the agreement mistake
houses
show examples
with out
Correct your spelling
without
show examples
 visiting their relatives or their close friends so they need
time
Use synonyms
 to be free .
For example
Linking Words
 , there is
one
Use synonyms
 famous
indian
Change the capitalization
Indian
show examples
 girl
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 social media
she
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 did not add any things
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 her account for a
year
Use synonyms
 ,after she finished her
last
Linking Words
year
Use synonyms
 of
school
Use synonyms
 she told us that she
need
Wrong verb form
needed
show examples
 5 years to forget
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
her
last
Linking Words
year
Use synonyms
 in
school
Use synonyms
 . On
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 hand ,
demerites
Correct your spelling
demerits
demerit
 can not be ignored . First of all
one
Use synonyms
year
Use synonyms
with out
Correct your spelling
without
show examples
 learning or studying that
lead
Fix the agreement mistake
leads
show examples
 to lazy
students
Use synonyms
 and they will forget
Use synonyms
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of basic information .
In
Linking Words
addition
Add a comma
addition,
show examples
 when the
students
Use synonyms
 are spending
Use synonyms
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of
time
Use synonyms
 free ,they will
lost
Change the verb form
lose
be lost
show examples
one
Use synonyms
year
Use synonyms
 of achievements and
creativites
Correct your spelling
creativity
 related to
educational
Add an article
the educational
show examples
 domain .
For instance
Linking Words
 ,
one
Use synonyms
year
Use synonyms
 of free
time
Use synonyms
 and when
students
Use synonyms
went
Wrong verb form
go
show examples
 to
Use synonyms
collage
Correct your spelling
college
show examples
 they will
fell
Correct your spelling
feel
show examples
 that not want to study and can not sit to learn and that
lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
 to
decrease
Correct article usage
a decrease
show examples
 in their level of learning .
Lastly
Linking Words
 ,
Use synonyms
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of student after they sit
with out
Correct your spelling
without
show examples
 studying ,they have their own business and
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
decided
Wrong verb form
decide
show examples
 to cancel their
Use synonyms
collage
Correct your spelling
college
show examples
. In conclusion,
have
Wrong verb form
having
show examples
one
Use synonyms
year
Use synonyms
 free between
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
year
Use synonyms
 of
school
Use synonyms
 and
first
Correct article usage
the first
show examples
year
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
collage
Correct your spelling
college
show examples
 has both merits and demerits and it
depend
Change the verb form
depends
show examples
 on
individual
Add an article
the individual
show examples
itself
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
.
Thus
Linking Words
, having
one
Use synonyms
year
Use synonyms
with out
Correct your spelling
without
show examples
 learning can be
benefit
Replace the word
beneficial
show examples
 for
Use synonyms
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of
students
Use synonyms
 who want to improve
thire
Correct your spelling
their
 learning
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 contrast , it will be
badly
Replace the word
bad for
show examples
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
show examples
not
Add a missing verb
do not
show examples
 have any
goal
Fix the agreement mistake
goals
show examples
 in their life .
Submitted by fatmaalraqadi579 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay lacks clear organization, with paragraphs that do not have clear topic sentences to signal the main idea. There is also an overuse of personal opinions without sufficient support or examples.
task achievement
The response fails to fully develop ideas or provide detailed examples. It merely states advantages and disadvantages without elaboration or supporting evidence, and there is a lack of focus on answering the question fully.
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