Most countries allow 18-year olds to start driving a car. Some say it is good to allow at this age. But others think that the age to start driving should be at least 25. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.
In recent
years
many countries
policy allows Change noun form
countries'
country's
people
who reach 18 year
old to Fix the agreement mistake
years
driving
a vehicle Change the form of the verb
drive
such
as car
. Change the article
a car
In contrast
, some believe that the best age
to begin
driving car
Add an article
a car
the car
at
least 25. I strongly believe that both of Add a missing verb
is at
this
has negative
and positive Add an article
a negative
impact
Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
for
society especially Change preposition
on
for
young Change preposition
on
people
, however
it Add a comma
however,
is never mind
if young Change the verb form
is never minded
is never minding
people
with 18 year
old driving Fix the agreement mistake
years
car
. The next paragraph will discuss Fix the agreement mistake
cars
this
issues with arguments.
First of all, if the Correct determiner usage
these
people
who was
18 Change the verb form
were
years
old can has
Wrong verb form
have
the
positive impact Correct article usage
a
for
their parents because they Change preposition
on
dont
need to pick up in Correct your spelling
don't
the
Correct article usage
apply
school
everyday
anymore. It can build Replace the word
every day
independent
side for the young Add an article
an independent
people
. For example
, when I was in senior high school
in the
first Change the word
my
year
my aunt always picked up me in
Change preposition
from
the
Correct article usage
apply
school
and I realize
it was exhausting for her. In the second Wrong verb form
realised
years
of Fix the agreement mistake
year
the
Correct article usage
apply
school
I tried to Add a comma
school,
drived
a Correct your spelling
drive
car
and it was
made me Unnecessary verb
apply
happines
because my aunt Correct your spelling
happy
can
rest in the evening time and I always went to Wrong verb form
could
school
by myself. In addition
, the
18 Correct article usage
apply
years
was the right age
because the
young Correct article usage
apply
people
can explore the world with
their Change preposition
in
Correct word choice
own ways
ways
through travelling. At the same time, Fix the agreement mistake
way
for
some Change preposition
apply
people
who not in high
economic class will be find Correct article usage
the high
this
difficult because they dont
have money to buy Correct your spelling
don't
car
for Add an article
a car
the car
the
children.
Change the word
their
In addition
, society believe
that the Change the verb form
believes
age
of 25th was
the right line because Wrong verb form
is
people
in
Change preposition
at
this
age
has
mature Change the verb form
have
mind
and can control their Fix the agreement mistake
minds
ego
when driving Fix the agreement mistake
egos
in
the road. Change preposition
on
For instance
, my friend with the driver
licence Change noun form
driver's
in
Change preposition
on
25th
was totally clear and comfortable for the passenger compared with my friend who Correct article usage
the 25th
drived
Correct your spelling
drove
in
their 18th. It can be seen the Change preposition
on
Replace the word
difference
different
Replace the word
difference
of control
the vehicle and driving in Change preposition
between controlling
Correct article usage
a traffic
traffic
jam. Correct article usage
a traffic
Than
, when Replace the word
Then
people
start in
Change preposition
at
this
age
it will be difficult to have training because they will busy
Add a missing verb
be busy
in
Change preposition
with
worklife
or university.
In conclusion, the first policy Correct your spelling
work
who
allows Correct pronoun usage
that
people
with
18t Change preposition
apply
year
old Fix the agreement mistake
years
driving
can Change the verb form
to drive
improved
independent thing in the Wrong verb form
improve
yong
Correct your spelling
young
people
but it can make
pressure Verb problem
put
for
their parents with less economic. Change preposition
on
Then
, second
policies give the smart drive generation but they Correct article usage
the second
maybe
Correct your spelling
may
dont hav etime
to practice how to drive well Correct your spelling
not have time
in
that Change preposition
at
age
.Submitted by sintakristiani22 on
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coherence cohesion
The essay overall lacks a coherent and logical structure, making it difficult for the reader to follow the argumentation. You should organize your ideas into clear paragraphs, each addressing a specific point, and ensure your essay flows naturally from one idea to the next.
coherence cohesion
An introduction and conclusion are present, but they barely address the requirements of the task. A stronger thesis statement and more conclusive summary of the arguments are needed in the introduction and conclusion respectively to effectively frame the essay.
coherence cohesion
Some main points are supported with examples, but the connections between them are weak. You need to clearly explain how your examples support your argument, and make sure that they are directly relevant to the question at hand.
task achievement
While the essay attempts to address the task, it does not do it fully or convincingly. Work on developing your ideas more comprehensively and ensure that you discuss both sides of the argument, as well as your own opinion, with equal depth and clear reasoning.
task achievement
Your ideas are not expressed clearly and in a structured manner. To improve, you should present each idea individually and expand upon it with clear explanations and detailed examples. This will make your essay more comprehensive and understandable.
task achievement
Relevant examples are provided, but you should further elaborate on them to clearly show how they relate to the argument and strengthen the points you are making. Ensure your examples are specific and directly support your stance on the issue.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.