IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

You hired a car from a company, while. While you were driving you had a small accident. Write a letter to the company to explain it. In your letter: •when and where you hired it •describe how the accident happened •what kind of action did you take after the accident

#car #company #accident #•when #•describe #•what #action
Dear Sir/Madam, I am writing
this
 letter with
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 intent to inform you about an accident I had with your company's
car
. To commence with, I hired a
car
names
Replace the word
named
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 Toyota
camry
Change the capitalization
Camry
show examples
car
 number XXTAA on January 1,
2024
Add a comma
2024,
show examples
 from Honda Toronto for 7 days.
However
, I was driving from
brampton
Change the capitalization
Brampton
show examples
 to
toronto
Change the capitalization
Toronto
show examples
 on January 5, 2024. Suddenly heavy snow
strom
Correct your spelling
storm
 started. As I was not used to
this
 kind of
whether
Correct your spelling
weather
show examples
 and I
collisied
Correct your spelling
collision
collided
 with another vehicle owing to
slippry
Correct your spelling
slippery
slippy
 roads. Eventually, I controlled the vehicle but its side mirror got broken and a flat tire.
Moreover
, I towed the
car
 to
near
Correct your spelling
a nearby
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 mechanic. I repaired it. It cost me $500. Now I would like to
returned
Change the verb
return
show examples
 the vehicle. If you want any other steps from me please write me back after
your
Correct pronoun usage
you
show examples
 receive your
car
. Looking forward to hearing from you soon. Yours Sincerely, Bhatia j
Submitted by kb781920 on

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Coherence & Cohesion
To improve your logical structure, ensure that each paragraph contains a clear main idea and that subsequent sentences elaborate on that idea effectively.
Coherence & Cohesion
Work on organizing your paragraphs more effectively. Each paragraph should be dedicated to a specific aspect of the situation: one for the car rental details, one for the accident, and one for the aftermath and actions taken. This enhances readability and improves the flow of information.
Coherence & Cohesion
Include a proper greeting in the beginning and a more formal closing at the end of your letter to maintain the suitable tone for formal correspondence.
Task Achievement
Ensure your letter completely answers all the bullet points presented in the task to achieve a higher level of task achievement. Mention the exact date when and where the car was rented, provide more depth to the description of the accident, and specify the actions taken more clearly.
Task Achievement
Although the tone is generally suitable, avoid informal contractions like 'I've' to maintain formality consistent with the letter format.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 150 words in writing task 1. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long letter will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 160 to 190 words in writing task 1. This will ensure a concise letter and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 20 minutes to write the letter and you need around 5 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long letter in 15 minutes.

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