Some people think that robots are important for human’s future development. Others think that robots have negative effects on society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
In nowadays
a lot of individuals think that Correct word choice
Nowadays
inteligence
Correct your spelling
intelligence
artificial
is Correct word choice
apply
Correct article usage
apply
a
great progress for Correct article usage
apply
Correct article usage
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
Change noun form
human
human's
life. Change noun form
human
While
the other think that is
not a good idea for our future for the society. In my opinon
, the effects of machines in our lives Correct your spelling
opinion
is
more Correct subject-verb agreement
are
possitives
and overweight the drawbacks.
On the one hand, I totally agree that androids it is Correct your spelling
positive
positives
helpfull
in human lives they are great Correct your spelling
helpful
with
performing Change preposition
at
and
Correct word choice
apply
repetitions function
. Fix the agreement mistake
repetition functions
In nowadays
it is more Change preposition
Nowadays
commum
to see artificial Correct your spelling
common
inteligence opereting
in a lot of areas in the world, Correct your spelling
intelligence operating
such
as in the hospital helping doctors to do a complexing
long surgery in an Replace the word
complex
operation
room or Replace the word
operating
for
reduce the risk Change preposition
to
of
human life when they Change preposition
to
are work
with dangerous materials. Change the verb form
are working
For example
, in a morden
Correct your spelling
modern
hospital
the neurosurgeon has the Add a comma
hospital,
aide
of robs because they are Correct your spelling
aid
mos
estaticts for Correct your spelling
most
this
kind surgery
Change preposition
of surgery
also
because Correct word choice
and also
ther
are Correct your spelling
they
medalist
.
Fix the agreement mistake
medalists
For
the other hand, Change preposition
On
also
can have issue
because of the machines in our lives. They can take Fix the agreement mistake
issues
work places
and can cause unemployment due Correct your spelling
workplaces
of
Change preposition
to
atomation
of the machines in the industry or Correct article usage
the atomation
also
can cause techinical
defects like Correct your spelling
technical
Correct pronoun usage
what happed
happed
to Verb problem
happened
Tesla
car with autonomous driving. Correct article usage
the Tesla
For example
, it is become
more and more common to see cashier-free checkout points in supermarkets Wrong verb form
becoming
this
can give a negative mindsets
about Correct the article-noun agreement
a negative mindset
negative mindsets
loss
of human jobs.
In conclusion, in my point of Add an article
the loss
view
it is evident that we have advantages Add a comma
view,
whom
help us in various areas of the market and disadvantages with the advance of Change the pronoun
who
thechology
can be a trouble for Correct your spelling
technology
workes
, but Correct your spelling
workers
i
strongly agree that Change the capitalization
I
Correct article usage
the positives
positives
Fix the agreement mistake
positive
efects
overweight the drawbacks.Correct your spelling
effects
affects
Submitted by ariannynani on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
The essay presents both views and concludes with a personal opinion, which addresses the task. However, the response lack depth and detailed explanation. To improve, ensure that each view is explored comprehensively, providing clear and cogent arguments for and against robotics in society, followed by specific examples to strengthen the points made.
coherence cohesion
There is an attempt to organize the essay logically, with distinct paragraphs for each view and a conclusion. However, the development of main points is somewhat superficial and the essay would benefit from clearer transitions between ideas. Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and use cohesive devices to aid the reader in following the argumentation.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite