Students should focus on learning in the classroom rather than show their status by wearing fashionable clothes. Thebefore, all students have to wear school uniforms. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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The main objective of going to
school
is to study. Some schools are implementing no
uniforms
while
others are giving them
a
Correct article usage
the
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freedom to wear any kind of clothes. Having taken other solutions into consideration, I agree that
students
should wear a uniform when studying at
school
. A
school
is a formal place for pupils to get education and knowledge. Many
students
come from different family backgrounds and economic levels.
Therefore
, wearing a uniform is essential to make them look equal at
school
and focus
for
Change preposition
on
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study
,
Remove the comma
apply
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because wearing fashionable clothes will distract others and could cause jealousy. Those circumstances are not conducive to learning and could make student only think about their appearance to impress.
For instance
, schools in Indonesia have rules to use
uniforms
every day because of the high economic gap in Indonesia,
therefore
all pupils could treated the same.
Furthermore
, the
school
should be a safe place for pupils to study and make friends with everyone.
Thus
, using
uniforms
could prevent
students
from making a group of friends based on their appearance or economic background. Many bullying cases happen because some groups of
students
assume that they are superior to other
students
, so they feel more powerful to push others. To illustrate, if schools give the freedom to not wear
uniforms
,
students
from wealthy families tend to show their status by using branded fashion and
making
Verb problem
forming
show examples
a group which
students
who use the same items.
As a result
, a gap between
students
occurred. In conclusion, I agree that it is better for
students
to wear
uniforms
every day because it
reach
Change the verb form
reaches
show examples
equality among
students
and prevents bullying. I,
therefore
, remain firmly convinced that the idea of wearing a uniform to
school
is a wiser decision.
Submitted by 2024successielts on

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introduction conclusion present
Ensure that your essay introduction presents the topic clearly and explicitly states your position, leaving no ambiguity about your stance on school uniforms.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion should synthesize the key points of your argument without introducing new information, providing a clear statement of your final position on the topic.
logical structure
Incorporate a range of linking words and phrases to clearly illustrate relationships between ideas and points.
supported main points
Use paragraphs effectively to distinguish and organize your main points; each paragraph should focus on a single main idea and offer supporting evidence or examples.
complete response
It is important to address all parts of the prompt, providing a balanced discussion where opinions are substantiated by clear and logical arguments.
clear comprehensive ideas
Strive to clearly express your ideas, ensuring they are comprehensive and easily understood by the reader.
relevant specific examples
Make use of pertinent and concrete examples to support your main points and illustrate your arguments, enhancing the persuasiveness of your essay.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • academic focus
  • fashion trends
  • peer pressure
  • social class disparities
  • disciplinary environment
  • cost-effective
  • school identity
  • sense of belonging
  • individual expression
  • dress codes
  • professional attire
  • body types
  • school spirit
  • creativity suppression
  • equal footing
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