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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#university #students #subjects #addition #time #attention #qualification
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University education offers a plethora of majors and subjects to study about.
However
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, because of that freedom, there are different points of view about whether college students should just dedicate their time and effort to finish what they started
,
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 or to broaden their horizons by learning various different subjects than their main
one
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. Both points of view will be discussed
further
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 in
this
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 essay. First of all, it is obvious that
one
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 should fully immerse their mind in
one
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 specific subject to become an expert. An example of
this
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 would be how Stephen Hawking, a Nobel Prize laureate, spent most of his life studying the science of time and space before being considered as
one
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 of the best astrophysicists of all time. By focusing only on
one
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 specific subject, our minds could be more sharpened and familiar with finding flaws and innovations that are necessary for the advancements of the field.
On the other hand
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, having some degree of understanding in various subjects can
also
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 come in handy in certain scenarios.
For example
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, if we were to be leaders who oversee different divisions and tasks, having just enough experience in the fields that we manage would result in more contextual and realistic decision-making.
This
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 notion is directly demonstrated in research in 2022 by Martin Anggia and colleagues, which proved that managers with experiences in two or more different fields consistently produced a series of more efficient decisions. In summary, both studying paths have their own specific benefits.
However
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, my personal preference aligns more with the former argument, as it is predicted that there will be more demand for experts than ‘jack of all trades’ in the future.
Submitted by avianitad on

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coherence cohesion
When considering coherent and cohesive writing, ensure a clear logical progression of ideas. While the essay contains a basic structure, transitions between ideas could be more seamless, and the argumentation could be better synthesized to aid the reader's comprehension.
task achievement
To fully adhere to the task response criteria, one should cover all parts of the prompt evenly and develop a well-rounded discussion. Here, both sides of the argument were addressed, but further elaboration and balance could have supported a stronger, more comprehensive argument while offering a sound personal opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Broaden
  • Perspectives
  • Specialize
  • Critical thinking
  • Problem-solving skills
  • Career success
  • Interdisciplinary connections
  • Structured path
  • Clear goals
  • Creativity
  • Innovation
  • Academic credibility
  • Recognition
  • Balance
  • Exploring
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